ℒive. ℒaugh. ℒove

feels like a dream

2012-03-04T01:12:00.005+08:00

i figured that no one reads this blog of mine anw,
and i just wanna pen down some personal thoughts and feelings i got during results day,
which is prob THE MOST significant day that will happen in 2012.

(if you won't feel happy reading abt results, then skip this post!)

-

It still feels like a dream, a damn good dream.
It has reached the point where i take out my results slip every now and then to allow the truth to sink it.
I PASSED, I FREAKING PASSED W FLYING COLOURS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

I was so overwhelmed when ruth and maxine ripped the paper covering my grades out of my hand, I just burst into tears haha!
good tears :') and boyfriend was like "What are the other results?!?!!?!?!" when he heard me crying after telling him my GP got a B.
and i sobbed all my results out!
It's such a freaking big relief and i'm sooooooooo glad that everything went freaking better than expected!
(if you read the post below, i was prepared to get only 1 A)

the happiest thing was that i didn't let down the people who were always there for me right after 2010.
MY PARENTS who searched ways and means to get my sorry ass back into school.
MY RELATIVES who were suddenly damn worried about me.
MY FRIENDS who believed so much in me, it scared me sometimes to think if i can even live up to their expectations...
haha special mention to ruth who never once stopped saying "I HAVE A LOT OF FAITH IN YOU MARILYN!" with so much conviction, i can't help but believe her sometimes
and people i rarely know but stuck with me through A levels and results day, keeping faith till the very end :')
the most heartening thing was seeing people so genuinely happy for my results, i was really really touched :')
Chitra hugged me so tight i could barely breathe, my sister LITERALLY SCREAMED into the phone, Miss Gao gave me a super firm handshake, Mr Latif sent me a fb msg saying he's really proud of me and the seniors were gushing on whatsapp about my results
SO VERY VERY TOUCHED!!!!!!! :')

something that i really hate is when people look down on me.
i really really hate that. i hate being judged as a "repeat student".
so to the one person who thought i was just a rebellious, lazy teenager, who mars the reputation of the sch...HAH IN YOUR FACE! MY NAME IS ON THE SCH WEBSITE!
yes that was very rebellious, but i'm lazy to ramble on about you.
LOL i just made myself laugh XD
i hope that this taught that one person sth: that not every "repeat student" is a rebellious, lazy and problematic teenager.
sometimes, students just need guidance and a little bit of hope.

I sincerely thank NJ for giving me back that glimmer of hope :)

I am going to try really hard to get a scholarship in an industry i'm interested in, to relieve the monetary burden from my parents.
It's prob the least I can do now, after troubling them so much at the end of 2010.

Having said so, I know that I should not get my heads too high up in the clouds.
I should and I will :)

Ending this post with a simple, yet meaningful,

THANK YOU! :)

i've died everyday waiting for you

2012-02-24T21:56:00.002+08:00

feeling pretty urgh today~

-

anw, results coming out next friday...
gonna prep my mind for whatever results i have..
what reaction and what steps i'm gonna take if i gotta cry HAHA
'cause srsly, crying on the public transport is waaaaaayyyyyyyy embarrassing!!!!

i forgot what order the results are gonna come in, gonna dig up my old cert and have a rough gauge..
i really think i'm going to hate the reaction on my CT's face :/

-

Math- A
Reaction: Happy, 'cause i think i had a lot of careless mistakes sigh.

Math- B
Reaction: Marilyn, you deserved it for not putting enough hard work and practice. Tear a lil, it's such a waste :'(

Math- C,D,E,F...
Reaction: CRY

-

Chem-A
Reaction: VERY HAPPY, 'cause i conquered this crazy fear i have for chem and i think i really did not that bad for chem eh!

Chem-B
Reaction: *prepares for scandalous look on CT's face* and sulk

Chem- C,D,E,F...
Reaction: *prepares for scandalous look on CT's face* and CRY

-

Physics-A
Reaction: DAMN HAPPY, 'cause i had tuition and i didn't waste money!! :)

Physics-B
Reaction: BREATHE and try not to cry, suck my tears up

Physics-C,D,E,F...
Reaction: CRY

-

Econs-A
Reaction: FREAKING HAPPY, like i die also don't think i will get A for econs!!!

Econs-B
Reaction: meh

Econs-C,D,E,F...
Reaction: CRY

-

GP-A
Reaction: SMS BOYFRIEND AND BRAG IN HIS FACE! hahaha but i die also don't think i will get A for GP.

GP-B
Reaction: Happy enough alr! :)

GP-C,D,E,F...
Reaction: CRY

-

SO overall, i think i can get ABBBB
oddly, A for chem!

not going to linger long in school after results, i need to find a happy pill after results.

Moving twds a new beginning

2011-12-10T03:24:00.003+08:00

for now, i feel that tumblr is prettier and more updated than blogger, so there!
i'm shifting! :)
for how long? maybe till tumblr starts to be less user friendly?

feeling pretty lazy to blog abt my life also, 'cause i reach home so late everyday, i haven't even done my epic-lazing-ard-the-house day yet! :(
tmr i'll do it! :)

been busy with PROM (which was a blast w the awesome 21s! ;) )
i am really VERY thankful for this bunch of lovely people! :)
HUGGIE WUGGIES they all to death! :)
we were getting damn high at our table, even though other ppl weren't haha! ;)

letting loose w some alcohol is pretty rad,
though have to find the "correct" pl to drink w
haha 'cause i get drunk pretty easily, but quite shiok also!
i just keep giggling and giggling and giggling.. that's all that i rmbr! XD
it's a good way to celebrate though,
END OF As WOOTS!!! :D

also been (VERY) busy w WORK!
which is very tiring :(
i gotta carry out large tubs of gelato (16 tubs!), count inventory, do accounts, serve customers etc. etc.
i guess it's actually pretty normal, but for someone who hasn't exactly been working
OMG MONEY SERIOUSLY DOES NOT COME EASY :'(
finally getting a rest day tmr, but back to work on sunday!
have pretty fun and cute colleagues, nice bosses too! which is very impt, 'cause i hate politics shitz! i want to be happyschoolgirl_92@hotmail.com! haha! :D
momsy came to visit me ytd, and seeing how shag i was (ytd i ended work at 6.30pm..slept at 9pm AHAHA! skipping my dinner!)
i asked her to pay me $7/hr, i stay at home! :D
okay la, i won't be so spoilt! it's fulfilling to be earning my own money too! :)

ok, off you go to my tumblr! :)
http://live1laugh2love3.tumblr.com/

Goodbye November..

2011-12-02T01:11:00.003+08:00

Hello December! :)

and my favourite holiday,
CHRISTMAS!!! :D
i looooovvvveeee the lights and the songs and the happy vibes!
(probably 'cause it's holiday month!:))

it's been 2 days since the end of As
this is what i've been doing
and i must say i'm pretty proud of myself for not going into lazy mode...yet! haha! :D

Wednesday (30/11):

Couldn't wake up in time for trg
'cause my body clock is screwed up from afternn exams! :(
made tam and lau miss mrng trg too,
but we went to shoot shoot, run run a bit :)

met mr sham after the longest time everrrrrr~
and the first thing he said was
"omg Marilyn, become so fat already ah!"
wlaooooooo *SADFACE*
but i do admit that i am rounder than before, sigh..
and when i told wuhong what mr sham said and asked "SO AM I FAT?"
he TOTALLY AVOIDED and CHANGED the topic! tsk!!!
haha okok i will go more trgs and jog often to become fit! :)

saw coach and mr latif too! :)
and our little juniors! :))
they are so built now,
watching them fight so hard for their friendly made us all excited over training! :)

ate caifan, planned more outings
(cheapo branded make up, hair treatment, mahjong, baking, xmas party)
EXCITED MUCH! :D
BUT GUESS WHO'S GOTTA PLAN 'CAUSE SHE'S THE MOST FREE?
hahahaha!

Thursday (1/12):

MUSCLES ACHE from doing nothing ._.

went shoppppppiiinnnnggg in town with zhu-er, wanling and jinsze for awhile
then with chitra, the arab princess ;)
but i think i'm super sian w shopping already..
TOO MUCH WALKING, TOO MANY THINGS :S
glad i bought everything i need for prom already! :)

btw my class went shopping and class dinner the day our papers ended!
and i spent almost an HOUR in an accessories shop buying..
nail polish! haha but it's superduper nice, cheap and good to use! :D
haha classmates were amazed by how long i took to choose...5 clrs LOL!
but it's super fun and exciting! :D
i think i'm gonna spend pretty long at cheap branded make up place too! :D
(mind excited just thinking abt the pretty clrs and fun tools!)

after buying prom stuff
zoomed off to meet my boy! :)
GOSH I MISS HIM SO MUCHHHHHH!
it's the first day we met after the end of my papers and it was such a relaxing day
my heart felt so light and happy, can enjoy every single retarded moment! :D
sometimes i feel like (playplay) strangling him to death,
'cause we're either talking damn DAMN serious stuffs,
or he makes me do the lamest things
like watch JACKASS 3D ._.
other times, he's so fluffy i wanna die! :D
while he plays his game of FM, i sing random songs and he hums along w exaggerated actions :)
SO FLUFFY! :D

nubbad huh?
at least i'm not spending every moment sleeping! :P
and i'm attempting to try new things nowadays! SO THRILLING! :D
i went to cut a fringe, now i have a proper fringe, it looks pretty good! :)
went threading, so my eyebrows look less boomerang-ish :P
did my own makeup when i went out, it's not bad too, got praised by chitra and wuhong ;D

time to hit the sack now though,
going for trg tomorrow! :)
(SEE! even trying to stay true to my resolution of becoming fit!)

Liberation is proving to be VERY DISTRACTING

2011-11-29T00:11:00.002+08:00

LAST FREAKING PAPER TMR!!!!!!!!!

I HAVE SOOOOOOO MANY THINGS I WANNA DO
I will spend each day meaningfully, doing everything that i have always wanted to do
go one step further and experience LIFEEEEEEE :)

gosh i'm so excited!!! :)

liberation is very distracting you know, i can hardly do any work today...
i think i did like 10 MCQs? haha

at first i thought my physics MCQ went quite badly
but end up it's not as bad as i thought it was
(pray hard never shade wrongly!!!!)
so *BIG SIGH OF RELIEF*

so for this week!

TUES:

Have Lunch with 21s! :)
Shopping for prom stuffs w Emilia and Jinsze!
(helping them to find dresses - ohhh i love this, haha i can just keep going "BUY IT BUY IT BUY IT!!!!" hehe!)
Dinner with?

WED:

Morning Training (8-11) NEED TO WAKE UP EARLY!!!! :B
Afternoon?
Night?

THURS:

Some family thing
omg i seem to have sth but i forgooootttttt...erm
oh yeah WUHONG DISMOUNT!!!!! :D:D:D

FRI:

Swimming with Ruth! :)

SAT:

Scoop Gelato for a function! :)
secretly eat gelato? :P
EARN MOOLAH!

SUN:

Soccer match near my house? (Spectator though HAHA)
Maybe go Gentle Paws with Wuhong? :)

MON:

PROM NIGHT!!!!!!!!!! :)

TUE:

Wuhong's off day! :)

OKAY FRIENDS! PLS ASK ME OUT!!!!!!! :D
i need a holiday organizer,
or else i'm sure to muddle up all my dates and meetings
ooooohhhhh new organiser!!! :)

AND I NEED TO RUN AND LOSE FATS!
WOOHOOOOOOOO
PILATES, MUAY THAI, YAYYYYYYYYYY

kids and puppies!

2011-11-27T15:42:00.002+08:00

why am i not studying?!?!
why am i watching random youtube videos??!!

ahaha
but beautiful kids and cute cuddly puppies
omg i can then die complete!!

Angels on Earth

2011-11-25T01:24:00.004+08:00

I HAVE MISSED Y'ALL SO HFSAHFJKASKJFHBBQMUCH!

it had been almost more than a month since i last saw them!
so it was like LONGGGGGGHUGSANDXOXO when i saw Ruth, Chitra and Maxine!
GOSH i never thought i missed them SO MUCH until i actually saw them!!
It's really a lot a lot a lot haha never exactly felt this way before!
i guess when you've been with people everyday for 4 years of your life, they have become somewhat a part of you and even though my life's been pretty hectic for a meet up,
i really do think of them subconsciously!

HAHA it was crazy fun "studying" 'cause we were just laughing AT NONSENSE!
seriously NONSENSE!!!!
i think chitra and me spent 5 minutes laughing at each other 'cause we both had no idea what we were laughing about and just kept laughing at each other for laughing at nothing!
coupled w my "silent" laughter (noise prohibited in studying area!)
omg we were practically TEARING from all that laughing HAHAHAHA! :)

pretty much how i spent my past 2 days
spending time w them :)

oh and i bought my prom dress ytd
pretty costly though *hole in pocket*
but it's pretty, i look so demure :P
HAHA wuhong was really sweet though
he went to look for prom dresses, 'cause i was still having exams
and made his friend try on the dresses so that he could picture how they would look on me!!! :')

training next week after 4294832094280 years, next week!
omg imma trip over myself again
but i get to see favourite basketballers and annoy the hell outta them :)

DESPERATELY NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT/FAT TOO :(

it's time to half-celebrate!

2011-11-23T01:51:00.003+08:00

HALF-CELEBRATION!!!!!
*pops the party poppers!*

'cause ALL THE INTENSIVE HASDKASDJSALIW PAPERS ARE OVER!!! :)
left 2 MCQS,
physics and chem next monday and tuesday respectively! :D

it feels so surreal that it's all gonna be over soon..
weird, queer, odd
'cause the whole "OMG SHIT NEED TO STUDY MUG" feeling will disappear right after chem paper!
BUT I'LL LIVE WITH THAT ;D

sosososo today as half-celebration
i got a surprise gift from wuhong!! :)
OMG
supermegaultrasurprise!!!!! :D
i totally did not expect this at all!!
haha just knew that there was sth he had for me
(i really gotta up my surprises man!! :S)

TAADAH!!! :D

it's an urban decay make up palette!!! :)
which has pretty pretty shimmer shimmer eye shadow and other eye stuffs
hehe it EVEN has a USB cable and SPEAKER!
hahaha quite hilarious!
it's for noob pl like me to play makeup tutorials and try on the makeup! :)
maybe i shall go play play w it tmr! :)

i am really really really x93842094830294820 ecstatic 'cause i really wanted sth like this quite long ago and i never really told anyone 'cept maybe maxine during ruth's birthday!
didn't even tell wuhong!
he bought it 'cause he finds it nice and know that my prom is coming up soon!
(and yes i did question him if it's cause "ORH HOR you think i need to put on make up is it!
but no la, it was just the simple prom reason - unless he's lying? :p )
so i'm really OVERRRR THE MOOOOOONNNNNNNNN!!!!! :D:D:D:D
*gush gush gush smile smile smile!*

hehe!
we then went to explore punggol end which is superduper pretty now
idk why but he's always cheeky and like to catch couples in action in dark corners
HAHAHAHA
so we had some retarded fun and ended up taking the same bus thrice!

I HAD GOOD FUN TODAY :))))

1D

2011-11-19T14:33:00.003+08:00

i love love love how they're really singing LIVE
and harry's hitting all those high notes beautifully! :D

DID YOU KNOW?
that they were individuals competing on Xfactor (UK) in 2010
and were put together into a group after BOOTCAMP ROUND
when they were supposedly 'eliminated' as individuals! :O
it was surreal watching the video when the judges decided to place them together in a group and compete with the "groups"! :D
from then on they just became more and more AMAZINGGGGGG! :)
and their friendships are superduper tight
probably 'cause of the experience of getting back to 'life'
after being 'eliminated' as individuals!
great to watch how they've grown and supported each other throughout the year! :)

ok just random fangirl ramblings
haha sian w studying hahaha!

The past is not a package one can lay away

2011-11-17T03:15:00.005+08:00

oh no, i can't sleep :(
my stomach and mind is revolting against all forms of slumber,
seems like it's camping awake and trying to complete some tuition hw
while tumblr-ing and fb-ing simultaneously haha!

~

The past is not a package one can lay away
- Emily Dickinson

Living w no regrets is possibly the hardest thing to do on Earth
it requires either an extraordinarily keen sense of judgment such that you never make any mistake EVA~ (note: impossible)
or a forgiving heart to let go of what you've done "wrong".

Then again, forgiving yourself is another difficult thing to do
not as easy as forgiving someone else.
why?
i think it's because you've placed a greater amount of trust on others than yourself
a.k.a you think that you will commit the same mistake again,
that's why you want this to be a hard lesson by remembering it forever, distinctively etched in your mind.
you let the "what ifs" cloud your mind and thoughts
and the perception of you committing the same mistake again messes up all your clear sense of thinking
a.k.a allowing you to commit the same mistake AGAIN, 'cause U NO THINKING STRAIGHT LIAOS.

that's why,
one should sleep off the nagging feeling of regret
only to gain some experience and learn from it.
fine line eh?
gotta remember it, yet not so clearly haha!

that's for exams and life.
heck all the carelessness mistakes i made already! :(
cannot change them, so just REMIND MYSELF
FOCUS DURING EVERY EXAM! :)

on life.

i think i do have many "regrets" in life.
But i prefer to think of them as experiences that have changed me and made me a better person.
they are embarrassing though *shy face*
haha like TAN JIE QI will forever remind me of how i burst out crying in front of her when mr latif said i can't play for A divs 'cause my ankle was in such a bad shape
(i didn't play the WHOLE 2009 A divs, and i REALLY WANT/WANTED SO BADLY to have a chance to play after trg for soooooo long - 2 yrs in fact)

BLAH!
haha but i have tried v hard to learn how to control my tears in front of ppl
i even googled "how to keep my tears in" on google okay!
haha! and it's hard, cause i'm really someone who wears her heart on her sleeve.
i'm sad, means i'm sad,
happy, means i'm happy.
and sometimes i get so angry i cry! LOL!

okay 'nuff said about emotions.
now actions.

you know,
i do believe that life is short and we should be young, wild and free while we can afford to
(willingness and ability - HAHA ECONS MUCH?)
we live for the moment,
and even though i may make mistakes in this moment (or every other moment for that matter)
i'm enjoying every second of it.

the scary thing is one day
when i realise that good things all come to an end.
yes then that's scary and "regrets" come tumbling in.

but just like exam scripts which have been handed in,
i can't change the situation,
but can only make the best out of it.

so yeah
livin' the moment yo.
cherishing every second.

4 more to go! :)

2011-11-17T00:59:00.005+08:00

anw today went pretty nubbad :)
at least i met my objective of chionging econs paper 1 ASAP doing whatever i can do!
and chem paper 2 was (ok hope i don't jinx it) not bad :)
OMG
it's like the first ever paper i think "phew! lucky me!"
haha let me feel happy for awhile! :)

omg just now i took a nap
and suddenly woke up thinking that i had a paper to take
talk abt exam worries haha
SO HAPPY CAN LEPAK AWHILE!!!! :D

4 more papers to go!!! :)

~

idk if i want this to end.
As, i mean.
'cause i think it has avoided a lot of problems
which will come haunting me after As.
that explains my heavy heart.

ohwellzxzxzxzxz

Louis Tomlinson!

2011-11-15T18:20:00.002+08:00

YAYYYYYYYY
I've chosen my favorite Direction! :D
Louis Tomlinson, he's like the cute funny one! :D
(the one who goes "only 4 days to go!" in his adorable smile and accent!)
AND he's older than me WAHAHAHA
the others all younger! :p
24th December 1991!
so easy to rmbr! :p

only 'cause it's someone's special day 5 months before too! ;)

BABY YOU LIGHT UP MY WORLD LIKE NOBODY ELSE~

2011-11-13T16:09:00.004+08:00

i'm on a slight boyband fever right now :D
hehe
onedirection + british accents
omgawd :D
i can't decide who i like the most!
hehe maybe i should just like alllllll of them!

Look for the Sun

2011-11-12T00:12:00.003+08:00

Math Paper 2 today.
It wasn't suppose to be difficult
but i had lotsa careless mistakes and undo-able parts which others could do.
it seriously made me very very very very very upset x8234903840329802
'cause math is supposed to be my best subject..
was emo-ing throughout the whole afternoon
sigh and even till now, my heart is quite heavy.

i really try v hard NOT to think about it
yet it keeps coming back.
seriously TGIF.
i need this weekend to focus REALLY FOCUS on getting down to PHYSICS, ECONS AND CHEM.

THANK GOD
for my mum, teacher, chitra, mel (alllll the way from southampton :)), emilia love! and wh
for trying to make me feel better/ actually making me feel better! :)
we are gonna stay strong yea emilia? :)
love that girl :)
you too chitra, you funny pretty bitch ;)
and my favourite boy in the whole wide world :D for being so cutely concerned :D

you know sometimes i don't know how we can make it last
'cause we have pretty different ideas about life.
i'm the very worried, anxious kinda person,
while he's the chillax, justdohisbest, thingswillworkoutbythemselves kinda person.
i think each personality has it's own merits and demerits, like seriously even sometimes i think i need to freaking chillax about my worries (which may not come to fruition afterall).
while i think people need the "worries" to fuel the drive, ambition and determination to achieve something in life.
opposites, yet in a way, we complement each other.
'cause he makes me feel better,
though i "STRESS" him sometimes
HAHAHA he said that! XD
which is kinda funny
i was stressed for GP and he was "you stress i also stress leh :/"
BUT I CAN BE FUN AND CRAZY WHEN THERE'S NO STRESS IN MY LIFE
LIKE I TALK IN CAPS AND SMILE LIKE MAD AND LAUGH LIKE THERE'S NO TMR
SO I'M A FUNZ FRIEND THAT'S WHY I HAVE SO MANY FRIENDS 'CAUSE MY SUNSHINE PERSONALITY IS AWESOMEZ LIKE ZAT!
hahaha, kidding abt the last part, but yes, i know i can be crappy fun and crazy at times :)

ah wth
just get this over and done with
AND LIFE WILL BE AWESOMEZ LIKE ZAT!

OMGGGG WANTTTTTTTZZZZZ

2011-11-09T23:27:00.002+08:00

Credits: HERVELVETVASE

pwetty pwetty!!!!!

DAY2

2011-11-09T21:58:00.002+08:00

GP wasn't exactly the best
'cause TOPICS I STUDIED FOR, WHY U NO COME OUT :(((

but it was okay, 'cause i completed it and just tried to fit in whatever i could!
haha! wasn't that scary afterall :)

math paper 1 tmr!
i practiced a little
but not a lot (like last year!)
haha but paper 2 die... :/

oh whutever for now
*THROWS AWAY ALL GP MATERIALS*
yay!

DAY1

2011-11-08T23:41:00.002+08:00

Detest.

Chemistry Paper 3 today.
It was okay, i had a much better feeling after the paper as compared to last year.
(zomg, last year i just wtf? at many qns 'cause i didn't know how to solve them + lack of time = angstyanxious)
this year, i learned to manage my time well + fast + chiong + check as i chiong like mad
so i stuck strictly to 30 min per qns and managed to (at least) do whatever i can,
though i didn't know how to do some parts.
but last year, omg i just felt like crying after the paper, in fact i teared while they were collecting the papers.
today, i was just wondering why students kept asking invigilators qns when they were collecting the papers and why the collection of papers took so long!
haha so far, i am well :)

alas, good feelings don't linger on for long during this detestable period
panic-stricken moment comes again while i'm (trying) to study for GP.
SERIOUSLY? how to study content? :(
i was ubersupertuber lucky that "Sports" came out last year,
i was banking on it LIKE MAD.
it was something i like + went thru during consultation.
EXACT SAME QNS LOL!
think i screwed up my Babette paper 2 though!
lol, so there B!
i was satisfied though, i'm not the fancifulwords kinduv person so B was good for me :)

SCARED FOR TMR
will update how tmr goes.
i am really fucking scared, 'cause if i fail GP, like WTH?!?!?!

i know a lot of pl care for me
and i am really grateful for the inundating well-wishes
even from pl i'm not v close to,
Gabby, Yuxin, Coach :)
and from close pl, yes you know how i feel abt ya'all :)

OKAY
I WILL TRY NOT TO LET MY B DOWN!

TBH

2011-11-07T23:09:00.002+08:00

tbh
i'm still quite scared ><
YIKES
but here goes nothing.

i postulate that this "confidence" issue happens the most for cancerians,
since this year, my class is full of cancerians so i did a mini poll
HAHA okay maybe my reasoning is just bullcrap.

but i hope, everything is all in the mind
whatever bad things may happen tmr,
let it go
move on x21 days later.

THE SUN WILL BE SHINING IN MY FACE
AND I WILL BE RUNNING AROUND MY HOUSE GOING "WHEEEEEEEEEEE"
(i swear, i'll do that!)

xoxo

FOOD

2011-11-05T21:22:00.002+08:00

*while eating duck tongues at Paradise Inn*
him: LOOK!!!!! I JUST FRENCH-KISSED A DUCK!!!!
me: O_o

yes, wesoflylikeaG6 we eat duck tongues, alligator meat and kangaroo meat before!
haha quek so adventurous w food,
while i prefer eating stuffs which i know perfectly well how they taste like.
so i always make him tell me what it tastes like first before trying! :D
so far, duck tongue tastes like quay chap (serious!!), alligator meat tastes like venison meat and kangaroo meat tastes like very dry beef!

just letting y'all know, in case you're just like me! :)
they don't taste thaaaaattttt extreme! :)

The Knot Prayer

2011-11-04T20:37:00.000+08:00

Dear God:

Please untie the knots

That are in my mind,

My heart and my life.

Remove the have nots,

The cannots and the do nots

Erase the will nots,

May nots,

Might nots that may find

A home in my heart.

Release me from the could nots

Would nots and

Should nots that obstruct my life.

And most of all,

Dear God,

I ask that you remove from my mind,

My heart and my life all of the “am nots”

That I have allowed to hold me back,

Especially the thought

That I am not good enough.

Amen

Author Known to God

no really, how?

2011-11-03T22:53:00.004+08:00

one moment i can be damn confident
and the next second i'm freaking scared.

i hate this.

on another note:
this made my day :)

(/adding on)

on a MUCH MUCH HAPPIER NOTE! :D

OMGIFREAKINGGOTTHIS!!!!!

okay i didn't win it, but it's still just as difficult to buy the dress, seeing how EVERYTHING runs out within a few seconds (SERIOUSLY!) on well-established blogshops!

launched at 8.30PM
i just kept refreshing the page at 8.28PM LOL! :D

Photo credits: THECLOSETLOVER

i am seriously NO blogshoppaholic as indicated on my fb wall la!
(pls don't scold me! :'( )
haha i don't buy much, always <$100, try my best to <$50,
choosing the best deal/worth-the-money clothes
and just see see look look, window shopping!
'cause i think it's v bad of me to keep spending my parents' money!
but i always share my nice clothes w my sissy!! :)
so it's like buying one piece, but DOUBLE the use,
so hua suan hor, like our birthdays! ;)
ONE CAKE, TWO PRESENTS!
MWAHAHAHA :)

SO SO SO when i start to work!
mwahahaha can happily spend my own money! :)

random: i think blogshops' designs are wonderfully attractive! :D
take a look at this!!!!!
PEGSANDPARCELS
it's so whimsical and delightful!
DON'T JUDGE ME!
haha it makes me happy! :)

seriously elated upon receiving the invoice!
it's such a pretty classic dress and the belt is sassier than the one above,
it's a thick obi belt! :D
NON-SHEER white too!!! :)
hope it looks just as nice on meeeee! :)
it's gonna fit the new wedges i got (at a steal!!!) from NEW LOOK after tuition on Monday!
the benefits of having tuition in town! hehe!

and it's NOT OFTEN that heels fit my teeny feet!!! :(
it's laughable how i can barely fit a SIZE 4 new look heels!!!
DO YOU KNOW HOW SMALL SIZE 4 IS?!?!?!
HAHAHA it's tiny ._.
HAHA!

okay much happier, shall contd studying (happily!) :)

In pursuit of happiness ♥

2011-10-28T23:45:00.002+08:00

saw sth interesting today on the newspapers!

tday's younger generation tend to be less happy then their parents and grandparents
but do you know that positivity can be inculcated? (:

omg it's so awesome right?
like an antidote to all sadness in the world
but of course, it requires quite a bit of acceptance and pro-activeness!

so then the newspaper carried on being GP-ish (haha!) by quoting evidence from an Australian documentary "8 Weeks to Happiness" in which they had 8 volunteers, who had happiness levels that are below the avg man in Aussie!
The volunteers were made to practice Mindfulness, Gratitude and Altruism!
The results? all of them raised their happiness levels by a weetle bit!
haha but still nubbad right, + a little here + a little there = a lot! :)

Then there's this part which said that these actions "raises and sustains a giver's happiness beyond the act for far longer than one would expect"

SO EVERYONE SHOULD BE NICE TO EACH OTHER
AND SAY NICE THINGS TO EACH OTHER
AND DO LIL THINGS TO HELP ONE ANOTHER
then everyone will be happy! :)

haha okay so i was more pro-active at being nice tday after reading the article and nubbad la, little little bit of happiness, 'cause you know you made a small positive difference in someone's life :)

monsters&ghosts

2011-10-25T00:10:00.002+08:00

"Monsters are real, ghost are real too.
They live inside us, and sometimes, they win."

scary :(

DIE

2011-10-20T15:01:00.001+08:00

3 Econs Case Study
1 Econs Essay
1 GP Compre
2 GP Essay Outlines
1 Physics MCQ
1 Physics Paper 2
1 Physics Paper 3

to be done by: tmr
work tally: 10
time left: 9 hours
total done: 3

WHAT'S THIS WHAT'S THIS!?!?!?!
this is a lot of work, lol!

something remarkable

2011-10-19T20:01:00.002+08:00

I hope Mr John Green is being remarkable in some way!
haha!

So it's like 2.5 more weeks to As
and it's scary 'cause i know people say it's okay just try your best
but then there will be judgmental people who go studied for 3 years should do better than everyone else
and then there's me who knows that trying your best can mean a lot of things
which includes pleasing my parents with extraordinary grades
which means getting into a good course and earning some decent happy income.

but i know this time
it's going to be over.
i can feel it in my bones!
and there's so much i want to do after As
i want to do something remarkable w me life
i wanna help people and make people happy
and also enjoy my own life!
so many happy plans filling my head and heart! :)

21 people

2011-10-14T23:35:00.002+08:00

HAHA
today was such a joyous day
i think the whole J2 cohort was damn high from graduating
LOL during "Inilah"
my class sang out loud + this other class beside us went
"Inilah Maktab B...Kita *HEY!*"
we all totally LOL-ED XD
OMG IT WAS DAMN FUNNY XD

i am going to miss 10SH21 so very much even though it's been a short span of 1 year! :')
i am really very lucky and grateful to have all these people here as my classmates!! :)
Zhu's such a cute little girl :)
she was so touched that she teared a lot! haha outside the hall
and said that the class is too nice already, can't ask for a better one!
i find that very true, SO VERY THANKFUL! :)
We may not seem like the most bonded class, but everyone in our class cares for one another in our own little ways :')

2011 may not be the best year for me in terms of circumstances
but these people here made it a smashin' 2011 for me :)
sure laugh like mad everyday XD

♥

45

2011-10-13T20:28:00.003+08:00

The Tinsel Rack!
gotta have the most lovable models and nicest owner! :)

45 more days to freedom!!!
45 more days to working so i can afford my own food and clothing and shoes and traveling and buying gifts for ppl and being happy and letting the sunshine on my face and sleeping till my pillows become unfluffy and twirling round and round the house and running up and down going "WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

lovely :)

anw i gotta new favourite colour! - RED!
red da sex man!
haha esp those red suede heels, dying for a nice pair recently!!! :)

when you're dreaming with a broken heart

2011-10-13T04:06:00.003+08:00

I SLEPT AT 10PM AND WOKE UP AT 3AM
THE TIME I USUALLY FALL ASLEEP!
LOL!!

but actually i kinda woke up 'cause i had a bad dream
now i'm feeling a lil sleepy again!

but the dream was so sad, the feelings so real
i just have to blog about it! :(
(to convince myself it's not so real HAHA!)

i dreamt about a break up and it was really SO HEART WRENCHING
you can really feel your heart being wrenched out during a break up
haha esp when you cry like mad and then wake up the next morning
that's the worst part, 'cause you so desperately want everything to be a dream
waking up only to find out that it's not :'(
and then you start to cry all over again.

haha i also dreamt of emilia, jinsze, junwei and mr yip all at the same time!
trying to make random conversations so that i appear happy and keep my mind off the sad thingums.
then there's the crying and him looking from afar just to see how i am
but not bothering to talk to me
OHMYWORD SO SADDDDDD :'(

i hate break ups :(

~

SO I JUST WANT TO PAUSE FOR A MOMENT
AND SAY THANK YOU FOR ALL OF THIS!!! :)
not only him, but for all the great fwens i have! :3
10SH21 is really a great class
and with "last day" coming up on friday
feelings of gratitude just overwhelm me :')

i shall do some special mentions on Friday
'cause i know some of my stalker classmates read this but are not tagging
like some scary stalker...HAHA!
HI SZENENG, HI ZHU-ER, HI (maybe?) KENNETH
and yes HELLO YOU EMILIA! :)

and THANK YOU GOD for my loving, caring boyfriend! :)
haha during 30km cycling last saturday
we kinda had a little disagreement and he was frustrated at me at first
(actually it was 'cause he was concerned w my safety)
and then i got frustrated back
so we were both frustrated at each other haha!

then while we were both frustrating each other
and it's really v obvious when i get sad/mad
i'll just get really quiet and avoid eye contact!
when i was totally lying to him about "i'm fine, i'm okay"
he said "we tgt for so long already, you think i don't know when you're really fine and when you're not?"
:') which touched me a little bit, 'cause that means he DOES notice!
and the whole part when he stopped cycling and held me on my shoulders and said
"we're going to settle this right now okay? we won't start cycling until we stop feeling like this"
which was v caring and mature of him :')
little things like this make me so very grateful for someone like him :)

HAHA afterwards the ride became very fun! :)
he kept making sure i was comfortable and unafraid!
it was freaking dark at 7pm and we had to cycle pass super ulu and dark places
OMGGGGGG damn timid of me but he said he would be scared if he was alone too! haha!
plus the thought of cycling all the way back to east coast seemed like such an impossible idea!!! D:

:)
OK DREAM YOU SO NOT REAL!!! :)
i shall go back to sleep! :)

sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

2011-10-11T01:26:00.002+08:00

background with 0 relevance though! haha!
oh wellzxzx but it was nice :)

World's Strictest Parents

2011-10-09T02:17:00.003+08:00

ohmyword this is such an interesting show!
haha pretty worth the time to for GP!
hehe!

and now i'm stalking the 2 singaporean girls on fb
HAHAHA!

although i really hate how singapore places so much emphasis on education,
i'm really glad i'm not bumming around the whole day
aimlessly..

this reminds me of Amy Chua, the book on the Tiger Mother
haha parents are actually fierce/strict 'cause ultimately they want the best for their children
yet it's so difficult to achieve the balance btw having fun and being strict

haha today on the taxi i told wh how
"i will never want to have kids in singapore"
my reason being "6 years old only and some have eating disorders,
still have to send them for tuition OMGGGGGGG
i don't want them to live that kinda life!!!"
erhem, overseas doesn't seem too great either!
the process of bringing someone up is so delicate yet accomplishing!

just like how accomplished i feel today!
completing 30KM on the road bike!
woots!
but that's another story! haha!

AH WATCH IT! INTERESTING! :D

iPhone4Steve

2011-10-08T03:14:00.002+08:00

a little late.
RIP Steve.

I just thought of how my life would be very much different without Apple
my iPhone has almost become an essential part of my life
i read the newspaper from my iphone,
and flirt w wh using emoji (haha!)
annoy szeneng with her photos :)
whatsapp mel who's overseas!!!!

OMG seriously revolutionary
compared to our laopok phones w snake that looks like a block and the games go "tee tee tee"

iPhone4S is another step towards groundbreaking madness
Check out Siri, which responds to the user like a personal secretary!!!
FREAKY MUCH?
yet fascinating, how Jobs always had a knack for knowing what people want!

~

I'M TIRED
I TOOK A NAP IN THE AFTERNN TODAY
AND WHEN MY MUM WOKE ME UP
I THOUGHT IT WAS TIME FOR SCHOOL
confused panic when i woke up hahahaha!

westlife

2011-10-03T22:06:00.000+08:00

westlife never gets old :)

my significant otter

2011-10-03T01:13:00.003+08:00

just got off the phone w quekie! :)
it makes me fuzzy wuzzy to think that i'm always the first person he's been saying good night/good morning to me every night/morning :3
likewise for me! :)
it's 269 days of calling each other every night to talk and make an effort to stay relevant in each other's life!!
yes, i got so happy i started counting the days!
haha but i'm smart k! i used a calculator as well! :P
and yes, it takes effort to be with someone who's not in nj anymore, to keep updated and know what's happening around him!!
it's scary whenever i think of us drifting apart, till the point where i can't seem to understand him anymore, it's like we've never met and everything was just a dream.
it's a horrible feeling :/
i'm happy that we're both working as hard to make it work out :)
269 days of "love you" over the phone! :)
HEHE! :D

OHOHOH
and i can't wait for the day when we go overseas tgt!!! :D
to frolic in "emerald blue waters" and walk around the city, flickering with night lights, watch the auroras together and catch snowflakes on our tongues! :D
ahhhhhhhhh :)
okay thinking too much! HAHA! XD

just damn bored and sian from econz nowie D:

The Pencil and the Eraser

2011-09-29T22:01:00.003+08:00

Pencil: I'm sorry
Eraser: For what? You didn't do anything wrong.

Pencil: I'm sorry because you get hurt because of me. Whenever I made a mistake, you're always there to erase it. But as you make my mistakes vanish, you lose a part of yourself. You get smaller and smaller each time.

Eraser: That's true. But I don't really mind. You see, I was made to do this. I was made to help you whenever you do something wrong. Even though one day, I know I'll be gone and you'll replace me with a new one, I'm actually happy with my job. So please, stop worrying. I hate seeing you sad.

I found this conversation between the pencil and the eraser very inspirational. Parents are like the eraser whereas their children are the pencil. They're always there for their children, cleaning up their mistakes. Sometimes along the way, they get hurt, and become smaller / older, and eventually pass on. Though their children will eventually find someone new (spouse), but parents are still happy with what they do for their children, and will always hate seeing their precious ones worrying, or sad. All my life, I've been the pencil. And it pains me to see the eraser that is my parents getting smaller and smaller each day. For I know that one day, all that I'm left with would be eraser shavings and memories of what I used to have.

“We never know the love of our parents for us till we have become parents.”

~

My grandfather passed away this mrng (mother's side)
I'm okay, it was actually more upsetting to see my mumsy so sad
and suddenly realise that that means that our parents are getting old too :(

made me thoughtful about how living is really transient and how people should do something meaningful in their lives eg. help other people in need to make their lives worthwhile.

the one person i cannot answer to

2011-09-27T21:55:00.002+08:00

myself.
sorry self, i failed you.

but sorry no cure.

i feel so angst now.
no one understands at all.

i want to be a good student, a good daughter, a good girlfriend, a good friend.
but it's like you can't be good all at the same time.
SO FRUSTRATING
SO IRRITATED

you make it easier when life gets hard

2011-09-25T00:42:00.006+08:00

POP LOH!!! :)

it's a good thing that i made it for wh's graduation parade
which will decrease his tendency of going on and on like a broken record
"you never go for my BMT POP!"
now he just goes
"it's still a fact that you didn't go!!!!"
haha yes yes, but see, despite being sick i crawled out of bed to go see you!!!
haha jkjk i was already feeling much better by then and spammed lotsa water the day before :)
it was definitely a weirdly proud moment to see him marching out
much tanner and much skinnier :P
with his new rank! :)
i sound like his mum haha!

PROUD OF YA! :D

and then he had a surprise for me the next day!!
which i love super duper freaking a lot!!!! :D

TAADAH!!! :D
he made a jersey for me too! :)
it's the same as his new jerseys! :)
made sure it was of a good size and had my favourite number!!! :)
being all sneaky with it!!
sneaky boy! :)
hehe i think it's really nice, the colour the printing the logo ;) and the feel of the material!! :D
yes yes master architect, must give credit to you! :)

another HAPPY & PROUD MOMENT! :D

so anws
after his game we went to visit kevin who was injured! :(
watched a couple of soccer matches, though i wasn't really focusing much,
just enjoying kevin's massage chair and eavesdropping on their conversations haha!

while they were reminiscing about how they started the whole soccer club and all
getting nj players down and players from everywhere
i thought of how extraordinary it was for them to have maintained and kept together for so long (about a year plus)
it's kind of like a nj alumni team!!!!
(WHERE'S OUR BASKETBALL ALUMNI TEAM? D:)

haha but yes it is extraordinary 'cause from helping out
i understood how difficult it can be to get players to go down for games
esp with army and family commitments
when some people stayed and some people left,
it seemed even more impossible to play together as a TEAM
when it's almost different people playing together every weekend
but they did it!!! :)
it's really v inspiring to watch them go all out on the field
when it could be just another ordinary plain playforfun game.

truth be told, every weekend when i go down to watch them play
i miss playing together with a team
i miss playing basketball with the people i have came to grow so fond of
i miss training with a purpose
and a little part of me inside stirred
haha the unlazy part of me which wants to go for training to improve, become a better person and player.
:)
it made me reminisce about my good ol' times in njbasketball too :)

I'm really glad and thankful that i can play a part in helping another great nj team :)

sick of being sick

2011-09-22T17:09:00.003+08:00

it's horrible the number of times i've been sick this year
and the number of times i've laid in bed with a terrible throat and high fever
I HATE THIS SOOOOOO MUCH NOW
i hate having the itchy throat, which makes it torturous to eat the simplest meals
and i hate the giddy-inducing fever that makes it impossible for me to stay awake for even 1 hr
'cause it's always fever, eat food, eat med, sleep, wake up, fever, eat food, eat med, sleep...
and the cycle goes on and on until the fever subsides.

see the crab says

EAT ME!!

and the buns say

EAT ME TOO! EAT ME TOO!!!

but i can't eat them!!!!!
I REALLY WANT TO EAT PEPPER CRAB SO BADLY :(

i think i ought to go get a flu jab & eat vitamin C to build up my stupid immune system
oh wait, and i forgot to mention the 4809482034982094823 times that i've caught stomach flu
so many times that when jinsze was sick, i knew immediately it was stomach flu!!!

ARGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHG
ME WANTS TO EAT NICE FOOD NOWWWWWWWW :(

Bon Voyage

2011-09-18T23:54:00.003+08:00

Mel has left for the UK, Southampton!
It's mighty super duper exciting!!! :)
after a 13 hour long plane ride and you POOF! end up in an entirely different country with an entirely different weather!!
The sights, sounds, smells and people all foreign, yet intriguing!:)
golly, if i were in her shoes, i'll be shivering with excitement!! :)
haha, but then the thought of leaving everything and everyone behind brought my happy images to a heart-wrenching end.
it must be difficult to be leaving so much behind, her parents, her younger sister, her familiar house and room, the sights and sounds, the food that she has grown so fond of and who can ever forget, the friends who have always been there for her!
then it boils down to one big scary thought
INDEPENDENCE
out there alone in a foreign country.
but don't worry dear, you have God to oversee all your affairs and Whatsapp/Viber just a handphone away! (technology rocks!!)

It's going to be a mind-blowing adventure for you my darling friend! :)
as i've said countless of times,
i KNOW and BELIEVE you'll do great!! :)
and now i've gained a free tour guide in the UK! ;)
TAKE CARE AND BON VOYAGE! :)
We'll all be missing you and hoping THE BEST for you :)
'cause that's what an awesome friend like you deserve! :)

~

GO WATCH JOHNNY ENGLISH!!!! :D
omg it's probably one of the best comedies i've seen!!!
the whole theater was laughing like mad!!! :D
and i didn't want the movie to end! HAHAHA!

proud product!

2011-09-17T03:10:00.004+08:00

Accomplishment!!!! :D

helped wh design a logo for his soccer team and i daresay, it's pretty awesome isn't it? :)
i didn't draw the lion(s) but edited the whole thing + colour + chose words (with his help too!:))
actually he keeps saying he's the "Master Architect"
while i'm just a "Builder" :(
but w/o builder, master architect also useless! :P

SUPER HAPPY W THE PRODUCT!!! :D
really hope it can appear on their jerseys!
*cross fingers* nothing goes wrong tmr!!!
the whole thing abt lions and city of lions (that's what it says on top!) is 'cause the team started out from mostly nj players so they wanted sth to do w lions!
awwwww :)
haha which explains the red and white too!
i think that's sweet! :)

you know i had to edit pixel by pixel :(
cause i:
1. had to learn photoshop in less that a day,
and the last time i really played w photoshop was during sec1 when we learnt how to use it properly during art! And i totally forgot majority of the stuffs we learnt! :(
2. i couldn't learn fast enough! HAHA so i was being all noobish and just playing around, hoping to hit jackpot with a random tool!
IT WAS SOOOOOO TIRING D:
even the "Master Architect" who DIRECTED me was brain drained! HAHA

but it was interesting and fun to do sth like this w him! :)
like a little project!! :D
w discussions on what best to do!
PW-ish! HAHA!

okay, 3am-ish, TIME TO HIT THE SACK!!!
ZZzZZZzzz

selfowned

2011-09-14T18:17:00.007+08:00

hi, today i got a little annoyed at the end of the day,

not too much,
but annoyed enough to spend a little blogosphere space to rant about it
/ cause lets'justsaythispersoniskinda"interesting"inaway.

so the thing is
today while going past the GO to make my way to mumsy's car
i passed by someone!
i don't exactly hate T (lets' call her T for TURTLENECK - haha you'll understand why later ;) )
just ya know mind my own business and cross my fingers i don't bump into T ard sch!
how unlucky i was today to bump into her :(
okay i still don't hate her, but pretty much find her some of her ways ridiculous!
so my mind was like "OH SHIIIIITTTTT"
but i just went *instant mask: smiley face* and said "hi :)"
and she said "YOUR SKIRT IS VERY SHORT YOU KNOW"
and walked away.
THANK GUANYINMA she didn't issue me a yellow slip/ stop me to scold/ try to get me into more trouble
probably cause she kinda knows me? wanna let me off for once?
haha okay that's nice, i'm glad for that, but i felt a little indignant cause
i don't really find my skirt that short!
like it's a nice "breathable" length which doesn't hinder my movement!
it's comfortable and i don't find it promiscuous/ seducing :/
okay but i shan't say more, since i didn't get into any serious trouble for that O:)

apart from that
i rmbred some of the ridiculous things T did in school!
HAHA quite HAH!SELF-OWNED! moments!

Last year during April Fools' Day,
the Council came up w a cute idea to rahrah school spirit!
They passed out some stickers which said "Haha you've been pranked!" to paste on unknowing victims' backs!
okay those may not be the exact words but it was certainly not those "PUNCH ME!" "KICK ME!" kinda stuffs!
so being playful Marilyn, i pasted one on Sherryn's back during assembly! ;D
AND THENNNNNNNNNN
during announcements, T came, tapped Sherryn and said (omg i rmbr the exact words):
"Do you know you've got something pasted on your back?"
Sherryn was shocked and replied "erm no?"

me, thinking: "errrrr spoiler much?"
and then T took it off her back and ask "who pasted this?"
i came clean, to which she said (pretty angrily):
"Do you know this(the harmless lil prank -_-) can have very serious consequences?"

me, thinking: ...errrrr?!?!?!
T: "where did you get these from?"

me: "The Council were giving them out in the mrng.."

and me thinks T was a JH Council teacher back then
HAHA SELF-OWNED!

:)

aiya it's pretty ridiculous ain't it?

there was another time when she argued w a (more senior) teacher
cause he asked his class to move to a shady spot when the sun was glaring at them during thursday's assembly
like seriously?
WHY SO SERIOUS?

i think everyone should have some form of flexibility in life..
or else
wear turtlenecks ;)
JUST SAYIN~

Exams blues greens reds purples...

2011-09-11T23:14:00.002+08:00

bad things happen when i don't blog,

so there, i shall blog now!

i feel super duper unproductive this holidays

and it's because i can't discipline myself well enough :(
the internet is too damn enticing and every time i try to limit my usage,

i just keep saying "5 mins more...5 mins more..." and it goes up all the way to an HOUR
same for my naps, i have this love-hate relationship with sleep

sleep gives me sooooooo much comfort, yet it's such a waste of time.

and now i know i'm freaking out over MATH

MATH, the one subject which i can do well in

and i'm freaking out over it..

my stomach's churning and i feel stomach flu-ish

well i think that's just my body's way of "freaking out"

and it sucks cause it's soooooooo uncomfortable :(
spamming ginger slices + medicated oil!

the last time i felt this way,

i failed math, LOL major fail

from A to U...

i need to tell myself i can do it

i need to calm myself down and i will be able to do it!

always have this problem w confidence :/
basketball, studies...how long more is it going to haunt me?

~

It was lotsa emotional&great fun gathering w 05 today

for Mel's Farewell.
i'll talk abt it some other day, but while the feeling is still in my teeny heart,

haha reminiscing the old times was awesome :)
it made me laugh + cry buckets :)

Something interesting happened today too!
My mum was going on about how at this age i must focus on my studies, not boyfriendgirlfriend not play just mug hard pia hard and then things will be better in the future.
don't go overseas, difficult to survive on your own, people are going to discriminate against you, you won't have people to fall back on.
stay in singapore.
and then today mel's mum gave me a whole different take on this issue.

She warmly welcomed me into mel's hse (hugs and smiles and all :))
and then asked me how i was,
told me that she always told mel that at this age it SHOULD BE
"boyfriendgirlfriend, sleepovers, having fun, making friends
just too bad that you all are living in singapore
grades play a very important role in your life.
But when you grow older, where are you going to find time to make (real) friends?
Go overseas, easier to score there than in singapore where everything's so stressful.
Take up a practical hands-on course, as long as you have the heart to help people,
you don't have to be the best, just have the heart, it's great already!"

ok it was sth along these lines
and i certainly found it heartwarming and inspiring!
i know my mum means well too,
and she supports me in her own ways
eg. sending me to school everyday / sending me home whenever she can
and i know that i will model after her to be such a great mum one day.
but i think it's essential that at this age, with my character, someone tells me to "enjoy life"
'cause life is really too short to spend it studying aimlessly!

so it was great meeting mel's mum today! :)

Sacrifices, gifts, compromise, romantic gestures, words.

2011-09-04T23:51:00.003+08:00

By My Side
- David Choi

I'm just listening to the clock go ticking
I am waiting as the time goes by
I think of you with every breath I take
I need to feel your heartbeat next to mine

You're all I see
In everything

I just want to hold you
I just want to kiss you
I just want to love you all my life
I normally wouldn't say this
But I just can't contain it
I want you here forever, right here
By my side

All the fears you feel inside
And all the tears you've cried
They're ending right here
I'll heal your heart and soul
I'll keep you oh so close
Don't worry I'll never let you go

No one else would ever do
I got a stubborn heart for you
Call me crazy but it's true
I love you
I didn't think that it would be
You who made it clear to me
You're all I need

I just want to hold you
I just want to kiss you
I just want to love you all my life
I normally wouldn't say this
But I just can't contain it
I want you here forever, right here
By my side

~

awesome meaningful video by Wongfu!:)
Here's the description:

To reach the ones we truly love,
to be by their side,
we need to show how much we care through various means.
Sacrifices, gifts, compromise, romantic gestures, words,
a look are just some of the things we do for those we love.

We've all made "balloons" for someone.

Happy Teachers' Day!

2011-09-01T23:43:00.003+08:00

i really dislike the new fb functions,
it's sllllooooowwwwww!:(

anw,
Happy Teachers' Day celebrations in school today!
I must say, i kinduv had a blast! :D
It wasn't exactly the celebrations, but mostly the crazy peeps ard me! ;D
I mean, singing a "Whole New World" w actions and all?
HAHAHAHAHA LOL! :)

the guys in my class are sensitive new age guys too! :')
#hopefortheworld HAHA!
they bought these large NJ notebooks and initiated the idea of writing on them to give all our subject teachers!
and look at the super duper cute and cool drawing kenneth did!! :D

more pictures up on fb
where you can see our class tees, which i played a part in designing! :D
*proud moment* :D

~

Our new iPhone covers are here! :D
Excited max, 'cause they look really cute!
I say "our" 'cause wuhong got the same cover as me but in different colour! ^^
I got black w white polka dots, while he got white w black polka dots!!
haha "kate spade" covers!
which is interesting 'cause it's more of a girl's thing
but he insisted on getting the cover!!
"it looks like a damaltion!!!!"
yes that totally justifies getting a "kate spade" cover! :)
just too cute! :P

RAWRRRRR
okay sleeping NOW!
hate being headachy from little sleep!!

2011-08-30T01:25:00.002+08:00

ytd the ytd it was a bad day
even the night before was a bad night
it was dab (that) bad,
like bad spelt badwards, dab bad!!

(omg i just made myself laugh
hahahaha! :D)

but of course, there were good times too! :)

it was actually very awesome to go cycling on sunday evening w hosr!!:)
it's been really long since we had such good brotherbrother time w each other!! :)
CARRY ON CARRY ON! :D

watched FINAL DESTINATION today
cause i thought it was really nice, from the way lauren described it and after i watched some lame ryanhiga spoof
it seemed tame and harmless..

LITTLE DID I KNOW..

OMG
i totally lost my appetite and *jawdrop* when the first person died
(i KNOW it's abt ppl dying, but OMG SO MUCH GORE?!?! :(
it was literally *splat squish blood die*)
i was eating tomatoes too..gah!

it was so morbid i hid behind a tissue paper
and didn't watch almost half of the movie
(yar cause that half's the gory bits, like literally BITS - think blood guts eyes omggggg)
okay i'm probably over-reacting over here,
but i believe this is my first gory movie
so pardon the amateur, i was equally squeamish after my first horror movie lol!

haha but it was pretty funny when wuhong snatched my tissue paper,
wiped his mouth and handed it over to me.
LOL!
after that i had to make do with my face behind my fingers :/
but can you imagine how funny i looked also!!! HAHAHAHA
i took a piece of tissue paper (from our meal of course!) and like 1-ply-ed it and plastered it onto my face while "watching" the movie
it's super mrbean moment :P

after the movie i was subconsciously paranoid for almost 5 whole minutes...
i was secretly suddenly damn afraid of heights when we were going down the escalator
i was secretly thinking of morbid thoughts like getting "eaten" up by the escalator teeth..
or like a machine falling upon me when we were in the arcade..

HAHA!
not listening to lauren's movie choices next time :P

2011-08-28T00:22:00.003+08:00

i feel so horrible today.

it's like waking up and feeling that you've absolutely nothing to live for.

BIG VOID.

and the worst part is i have no idea why i'm feeling this way
i'm not sure if it's because of the weird dreams i'm having
which are soooooooo weird i have no way to go about explaining them
it's seriously like *pardon my language* mindfuck
i feel so jumbled and boggled maybe i ate drugs and i didn't know or what

urgh
i really hope this feeling goes away.

i hope sleep does me some good
and i'll wake up happy tmr :/

tummy's not doing so well either

OH FUG

2011-08-26T01:06:00.001+08:00

ohfugfugfugfugfugfugfug
i'm just going to rely on pure genius
if i have any of that left in me

remind me to stay back for econs consolidation every week now
sigh.

wide smile (:

2011-08-25T21:25:00.003+08:00

it's weird how i felt so doomed ytd
(and still am feeling damn DOOOMMMMEEEDDD w so much *screams* macro to study,
imma study...selectively for the time being
sorry ms chua, i really really really enjoy your econs lessons!!!
but there's only so much i can do in TWO FRIGGIN' DAYS DAMMIT!)

and yes back to how i feel like imma die when i see the paper tmr
like *stuns and die on the spot*
but there's still a fuzzy wuzzy happy warm part in my heart where i know i'm still alive
(albeit hyperventilating, gasping for breath after looking at the paper lol)
and everytime i start to ganjiong spider a little,
i think of that warm fuzzy feeling and know that i'll be alright :)
and it's beautiful (ghey description, but that's the closest i can think of now)
cause it has never affected me in such a positive way before :)

and i felt so screwed, i had to do online retail therapy
bought a dress a little on impulse,
but it looks nice, hope it fits wellllllll
since dresses are also good for dates...

SO IT'S GOOOOODDDD YEAHHHH :)
HAHA warped reasoning to please my guilty self :P

after i die tmr and continue dying during physics tuition,
i will go to heaven at some changi village place to have dinner :)
CAN'T FRIGGIN' WAIT!!!!!!!!!! :D

HB ♕

2011-08-24T00:09:00.002+08:00

on a much much muuuuuucccccchhhhh lighter note,

HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY! (:

crippled.

2011-08-23T23:21:00.003+08:00

I don't even know when or how did i learn to be so easily freaked out/stressed

since i totally can't absorb anything in my state right now,
and i don't want to get myself even more tensed up,
i shall rant away on my blog again..
something i should have done..
perhaps last year.

it's horrible when my mind becomes conscious of the ticking clock,
grains of sand trickling away in the hourglass.
The mind no longer focuses on interpreting & analyzing texts
but skim through words, desperately trying to absorb anything, anything it can.
it stifles, it cuts, it forces everything down my throat.
the words resist, tearing the sides of my throat
yet the pulsating muscles push them down, down, down.
the words claw and scratch
leaving a bloodbath and tears in its way.

HAHA damn morbid
i got carried away!

but learning doesn't work that way,
knowledge never gets known that way.
i must get to understand this!!

sigh.
and it's frightening, cause i couldn't study the past 3 days due to my fever
with 1 day left, it's freaking scaring the shit outta me.
and i admit, for the first time this year,
that fear came back again to haunt and immobilize my mind.

my insides start to ache,
and i'm unsure if it's the stomach flu or
the physical manifestation of that.
BLAH
i take comfort in the smell of medicated oil.
ya know the poot-le-yi-sheng medicated oil :)

and i wanna go eat supper to take my mind off things
but wh's not 2 mrt stops away :(
so i'm back to medicated oil (love)
HAHA i think i used half a bottle today already
RAWR

just like how Harry Potter met Death like an old friend
i think it's my destiny to meet Fear like an old friend..
what rubbish
haha but you get what i meannnnnnnnnnn

RAWR RAWR RAWRRRRR MAMA

Of birthdays, burpin' & silly nicknames

2011-08-23T00:32:00.004+08:00

HAPPY (EARLY) BIRTHDAY! :D
you have an awesome girlf here, just sayin' ~
HAHA! :D

surprised him x2 for his birthday with different groups of his friends! :D
OMG I LUUUURRRRVVVVEEEE SURPRISES! :D
so it was fun to see the look of surprise on his face! :D:D

erhem
there was a particularly embarrassing incident for him,
which was highly entertaining for me! :D
we took out the awfully chocolate cake in a bar/pub (is there a difference?)
AND THEN!
this 30 ++ year old woman (he said "OMG, NO! SHE'S NEAR 40!!!")
erm sauntered over to our table with a glass of beer or sth in her hand
and went "whose birthday is it? *smiles*"

ok give you more details on how she looks like.
she wore a plain white top, specs and had long black hair
typical working woman look.

so i was like "okay, she's here to wish him happy birthday, that's alright :)"

carrying on,
we all pointed to him to indicate he was the birthday boy
and she went "OH!" and went to PUT HER HANDS AROUND HIS SHOULDERS!!!!!
she then started to flirt with him!
OMGG HOW DARE SHE!!!!!
*possessive gf mode*
but after awhile seeing how awkward + horrible he was feeling inside
i turned my face away, hid it behind my hands and kept laughing and laughing and laughing!!! XDD
i am such a awful gf for not rescuing him! :D

and while she went on talking
the whole table kinda ignored her haha so she went back to her seat dejected :P
*victory song in the background*

it was definitely the highlight of the night!
HEHE! :D

BLAH
i fell sick after that night w fever then stomach flu :(
there's so much gas in my stomach when i hit it
it goes BLOOP BLOOP BLOOP
like Agnes in "Despicable Me" blooping her cheeks!! :3
it's terrible to be sick before Prelims :(
sighhhhhh
but i'm feeling soooo much better now!!! :)
which is a good thing! :)

DAMN YOU AUTOCORRECT!
i am NOT a PROCESS!

& now all i want to see,

2011-08-18T23:55:00.003+08:00

Thank you Xinyi, Lauren, Chitra and dear little Emilia! :)

Chitra came to visit the caifan store today!
She smelt like detergent :P
but it was great to catch up & share my worries! :)
She's like my BRA-DUH! :D

♥♥♥♥

is a sky full of lighters :')

Breaking point

2011-08-16T23:03:00.002+08:00

At the end of the day,
you can either focus on what's tearing you apart
or what's keeping you together.

Prelims in just about a week!
I'm going to do everything in my capacity to make history NOT repeat itself.
i CAN'T risk it again.
i just can't...

i feel tired having to pull off a happy front all the time.
for this once, i wish someone can make me cheer up.

i feel so mentally and physically drained
and i hate it when all my sister does is to MAKE THINGS WORST

i'll try to focus on what's keeping me together.
but it's difficult to say my family, when my sister's being an ass and my mum does nothing about it.
& it's not easy to say my friends, when i haven't been talking to them much/meeting up with them.
and there's still so many things going on in my life
it can't slow down and life STILL goes on.
i'm missing so much; i'm not doing enough.

i'm crumbling inside with all the lost time and faded memories.

& i just feel pretty sad that somethings
somethings
just don't make me feel any better.

i am a GENIUS!

2011-08-14T23:45:00.002+08:00

cycling @ECP today! :)
in hopes of cheering someone up! :)
hehe it was unexpectedly exceptionally fun
'cause i learnt how to do sth new today! :D
all thanks to my shifu over there! :P

i must first start w the laments of a beginner road biker!
OMG DON'T BELITTLE THE ROAD BIKE!
it's not the normal mountain bike, which i can cycle with NO KICK!
HAHA it has muchmuchhhh thinner wheels, it's muchmucccchhh lighter and muchmucccchhh higher (okay you're supposed to be tiptoe-ing like it's natural to do so, but i'm not used to it!) and you got to bend forward and ride it.
so it's like PHYSICALLY challenging for me, given my erm unique stature! :P
shifu had a v tiring time trying to teach me how to ride it!
HAHA but i swear, i think i'm gifted!
i learnt it in abt 15 mins! :D
HAHAHA ok actually it's supposed to be no kick for someone who knows how to cycle, but rmbr MY UNIQUE STATURE, MY UNIQUE STATURE!!

LOL, even the shopkeeper had doubts abt me riding the bike!
he said "she never learn before is it? not safe la really! and this is the shortest road bike we've got, don't think she shld try la."
(oh reaaaaalllllyyyy mr shopkeeper? ;P)

haha but initially i was damnnnnn scared too,
cause i felt that it was really high and difficult for me to balance on
but shifu insisted that i try something new and it would be pointless if we were riding different bikes cause he wanted me to try out how a road bike feels like!
ARGHX!

sooooo we took abt 15 mins outside the shop trying to get me to overcome my fears,
get on the bike, turn (OMG!!!) and dismount the bike!
AND YAY I SUCCEEDED! :D
haha then it was time to take it to the road!
where shifu constantly went "HANDS ON THE BRAKES!!" and "CONTROL CONTROL! CONTROL THE BIKE DON'T LET IT CONTROL YOU!"
quite sternly like a shifu HAHA! XD
but it was all for my own safety, plus he kept ensuring that i wouldn't be startled by ZOOOMMMIIINNGGG cyclists and swerving little brats! :)
awwww :)

HEHE SO I CONQUERED THE ROAD BIKE! :D
but have yet to learn how to dismount properly! :P
back to mr shopkeeper!
i was FULL OF PRIDE from learning how to ride it
so i rode it into the shop and then he asked "so fell down a lot not?"
and i said "NOOOOOPPPPEEE! ;)"
haha and he awarded me with a "WELL DONE!"
in the v teacher fashion! LOL
he could have awarded me w cheaper bike rents! :(
1 road bike goes for $20 for 2 hours! :'(

hehe so i'm actually v proud of me-little-self today! ^^

Forever 21!

2011-08-14T00:42:00.003+08:00

Actually wanted to do this blogpost ytd (ie. Friday)
but was tooooooooooo shag to do so!
HAHA it was a uber long friday this week!
and the whole class was getting crazy from econz overload at the end of the day!
it was v funny though, how everyone went mad, laughing at the stupidest stuff, getting distracted easily and just acting like doofus-es xD

21 is really an awesome class ;)

it's a very different feel from 05
but still a very warm, happy and good one :)
another STARK contrast is the height of guys from 21 (with ONE exception :P) and 05!
GOSH, 21 guys are like TOWERING above me! like 175 ++ 180++!
HAHA that makes PE super fun!!! :D
& PE IS ALWAYS FUNZ W 21s!!! :D

although it's been less than a year,
i feel superduperwuper welcomed, happy and lucky to be in 21! :)

it's like not v awkward already,
i can be my retarded self and not feel weird
cause they'll tolerate my nonsense and laugh together! :D
wheeeee~
HAHA :D

anchored

2011-08-11T23:53:00.000+08:00

i've got your (sexy)back

2011-08-11T01:02:00.014+08:00

you know what?
i finally know what i am really really really x3498204832094830294382 dying to blog about...
CLOTHES!!!!!
a.k.a the reason why i haven't been studying that much, cause OMG blogshopping OMG!!!!

now there, before you jump to the conclusion that i'm some spoilt brat/bimbo/spendthrift who does nothing but shop all day,
*TTTTEEEEEHHHHH* i beg to differ!!!!
haha although i've been eye-raping blogshops for almost the whole of today,
i have not bought a single piece of clothing! :)
('cause actually my mum isn't that happy when i blogshop, so being a nice and filial kid, i try to minimize my blogshopping expenditure! *cues hands clap!*)

AND I JUST NEED SOMEWHERE TO RAVE ABOUT WHAT I FIND NICE/
WHAT I REALLY WANT!!!!! :B
(ALSO to prove to my irritating boy that HEY I'VE GOT GOOD -at least NOT BAD- TASTE!)
so if you've lotsa spare cash (like say, $890? :P),
you know you can always pick something from here and give it to me as a belated/early birthday present or something alright!!!! :))))))
MUCH MUCH MUCH APPRECIATED!!!! :)
xoxo

clothes that have been catching my eye lately:
polka dots, loud tribal prints, floral prints (as per usual :))
AND SEXY BACKS! ;D

i think showing a little of your back exudes a sense of mystery and a dash of sexiness!
esp deep V-back dresses! OOOooooOHHHH!
and if you can't flaunt your front, so flaunt your back! :D
(and that's sth that every girl has!:))

so here are a few pieces that i absolutely adore
(and really wish i can purchase, if not for the slightly steep prices..
I'd wish i'm working and earning my own money so i can get them without having to feel so guilty :/)

Fruit Loops Dress in
Vintage Cream/ Classic Black/ Tiffany Blue
(MANUFACTURED)
Available in Size S/M
$30
from www.lilypirates.livejournal.com

lovin' all 3 colours!
black's sold out though, so left with the white and blue to choose!
white's classy, but i must say, blue is pretty cute!!! :D

Strappy Back Top
in 4 Delicious Colours
from www.chaceylove.livejournal.com

the back detail and slighty flouncy finish makes this top chic yet girly!
probably getting this! hehe!
in red or yellow! :)

also Available at www.leflirtini.livejournal.com
at $25

Floral Sweetheart Top in
Cream/Pale Pink/Rose Pink/Vintage Rose/English Rose
(MANUFACTURED)
$24
from www.catwalkclose.livejournal.com

featuring an M-shaped bustier in 7 different lovely FLORAL PRINTS!!!! :D
should i get this????
it's realllllllyyyy pretttttttyyyyyyy!!!!

Pleat Detail Tube Top
in Deep Red/Electric Blue/Gunmetal/Nude
(MANUFACTURED)
$25
from www.catwalkclose.livejournal.com

sadly, missed the backorder!
but i really adore this top A LOT A LOT!!!
love the Deep Red colour and the pleats in the front!
plsplspls have extras from backorder!!! :(

Tiered Chiffon Skirt in
Black/Wine
(MANUFACTURED)
$26
from www.catwalkclose.livejournal.com

same for this! AHHHHH the red is to die for!!! :(

haha my sister said it's better to buy manufactured pieces cause it's more
"worth it", "one of its kind"!!

ok done w ravings,
time to sleep!!! :)

falling sick i think,
keep sneezing, sigh :(

screwd up dreams

2011-08-10T22:26:00.005+08:00

it's weird how i can dream about someone and miss someone,
when we have not met.

reality-wise,
i need some motivation to study :S

i have been doing quite a lot of thinking recently,
but just can't formulate my thoughts into words and a good blogpost.
doubts fill me.

LIFE.
is getting really dry these days.

~~i wish i were in uni already.~~
i wish we were all together more,
just like before.

urgh

2011-08-10T00:05:00.005+08:00

just pretty much what i've been going through/feeling these days.

ooohhh if only i can say this :/

that suits me just fine,
being a little husky.

SHARMA IS BACK!

2011-07-31T23:06:00.003+08:00

HAIHAIHAIHAI!!!!!
My pretty friend is baaaaccccckkkkk!!!! :D

Stayed over at her hall (Eusoff!) impromptu-ly
HAHA and it was quite a happening night!! :)

Eusoff is great, though the small room kinda scares me HAHA
just a short walk from supper (OMG DROOLS)
and a standing broad jump away from Kent Ridge Terminal
gotta love NUS ;)

went for supper,
attempted to stalk an angmoh backpacker who was holding a rope?!?!
HAHAHA! it was 1++ am and it was ulu!
we saw an angmoh guy carrying a large bag and trekking in NUS
wanted to be brave and ask him "HI THERE! what are you doing here so late in the night w such a big bag!! :) "
so we REALLY RAN AFTER HIM like *PANTS* RUN *PANTS*
HAHAHA until chitra stopped us and said
"don't you think this is out of a horror movie and when the 2 girls die, the audience are going to go "HOW STUPID!""
HAHAHA so we ran back to her room LOL LOL!!! XD

then we walked to WEST COAST PARK at 2am
HAHAHAHA WE'RE REALLY CRAZY XD
i didn't know west coast park isn't exactly connected!
first we wandered into a SUPER ULU AND DARK PART!!!! D:
and chitra kept looking down at her phone
while i had to PRETEND to be OPTIMISTIC and BRAVE
and say happy things like "DON'T WORRY! WE'LL BE OKAY!!! (FAKE SMILE)"
though i was actually feeling v freaked out about meeting a murderer or a ghost!! D:
HAHAHA finally found the less ulu part (the macs area) and went to the SUPER DUPER FUN PLAYGRD!!! :)
it was definitely worth the walk!!! :D

crashed in her bed at 3.30am while she went to talk to her OG peeps!! :)
it was an awesome nightsout!!! :)
w my lovable pretty friend i miss sooooooooooo much!!!! ;)

~

and this is an ai xin dinner which wh got for me while i was feeling sick and weak!!! :)
when i was taking a picture of it he said excitedly
"Say i cooked it myself okay!!! So other girls will think i'm very eligible!!!"
and i was -.-
TOO BAD the container has the shop's name! HAH! :P

haha but yes,
can you see how happy i was? :D
i even mei tu xiu xiu-ed it with hearts! :P

:::::)))

Reasons to smile :)

2011-07-25T23:39:00.004+08:00

I can feel it creepin' into me again.
Tiredness.
WHAT'S WITH THE CRAZY AMT OF HW SERIOUSLY!!!! D:
sigh.

gotta cut down on time w the boy on the weekends :/
haha but he never fails to make me happy/smile w his retardedness!!! :))

HEHE
so as everyonewhoknowsmeknows i like to hum/sing random songs over and over again
HAHA! :D
so one day Emilia asked me if wh sings along w me
then i thought about it (seriously)
HAHA!
YES HE DOES!!!! LOLLOLLOL
but he always anyhow sing one
i swear he has POTENTIAL!!!!

SOOOOOO when i was doing my work on sunday, while he played his entertaining game of FM
i asked if he thinks he can sing (properly)
and then he went "OF COURSE!!!!"
"HAVE YOU HEARD THE URUGUAY'S NATIONAL ANTHEM?!?!"
he started playing it
it sounds very very cute! :)
although i don't understand a single word, but it's really worth a listen!
like an EAR-OPENER! :D

he then proceeded to erm sing out all the OPERA PARTS! XD
"SEE I CAN SING WHAT!!! *OPERA'S VOICE*
it was hilarious!!! :D:D:D
awwww :)

& West Coast Park is really nice
OMG @ THE PLAYGROUND! haha looks damn fun! :D

~

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG
CHITRA SHARMA IS FINALLY COMING BACK TMR!!!!!
AFTER 8 LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNN
NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
NNNNNN
NNG
months!!!! :D:D:D

from the outside

2011-07-25T00:25:00.002+08:00

i miss everyone.
all those pictures on fb;
i miss everyone.

i miss playing ball
i miss laughing till my sides burn and my eyes tear
i miss getting whacked by ppl for being irritating
i miss being uggs for a certain someone :')
i miss being defended for being called uggs
i miss those times we all shared tgt.

different groups of people,
w all those lovely memories.

if i were a Little Miss,
i'll be Little Miss Miss!
haha...

sometime during the following days, months and years
you'll all be meeting new people.

but never forget uggs k?
:')

Happy Couples

2011-07-21T22:56:00.005+08:00

It's almost hard to believe, but this IS singapore!!! :)
Gorgeous scenery + Sunset!!!
Of course, there's the really happy couple too
and i can't stop smiling when i view the photos on a Photography Group (FB!)! :)

Secretly wanting to do this!!!
It is cute and the memories captured are priceless!! :)
tumblr-worthy too! ;)

found the girl's blog on the Group page too!
she's lovely lovely lovely!! :)
she models for blogshops and i feel superduper inclined to buy the clothes which she models for,
'cause she's lovely lovely lovely!!! :D

her boyfriend's superduper Westlife-looking HAHA! :D
and i like like like the shirt he's wearing!!! :)
on a guy that is! :D

despite my horrible day, they made me feel a whole lot better! :)
oh and my mum volunteered to buy B&J's icecream for me after hearing about my bad day! :D
so yay!!! :)

(update)
oops i just did...bought the clothes! HAHA

TBH

2011-07-21T20:12:00.002+08:00

TBH:
I'm slightly (more) sick of explaining my situation to people who forget or don't know.
And i hate living under the autocratic rule.

and yes i blame myself
and i wish i wasn't born
and i want this all to stop.

One thing to look forward to,
Chitra's coming back to Singapore next tuesday
and i hope things will pick up along the way.

Today was just a really horrible day.

Desclamer

2011-07-21T01:12:00.002+08:00

Be careful of what you say.
'Cause it better be what you mean.
You could put a *disclaimer
if there is a catch,
that would drive me insane.

Appreciate what you have,
or don't have it at all.

Do I look like i like to eat?

2011-07-11T00:40:00.003+08:00

Birthday w the boy! (:

Saturday (night!)

delicious foooooddddddd! :D
and i got to eat these, 'cause he says all i talk about is good food and i like to eat!?!?!?!
:O
NOT TRUUUUUEEEEEE~
haha okay true to a small extent! :P
hehe been eating lotsa nice good food ever since i've been going out w him! :D
*rubs tummy w satisfaction*

food's great! :)
esp the lip-smacking fresh oysters (you can taste the ocean! :O) and the appetizer!!! :):):):)

so i asked him if he found the place from hungrygowhere.com
he said nope!
and i GASP!!!!! and said it deserves a spot on the website!
but he gave me this sneaky smile and said it's best if ppl don't know,
so it'll be empty and we'll be the only customers there and have the restaurant all to ourselves
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :)

*BURP*
after filling our stomachs to the brim,
we took a sweet sweet stroll on the beach (not saying which!;) )
happy!! :)

Sunday (morning!)

made a cake together! :)
(cause i spoilt my own surprise by guessing he'll bake a cake -.-)
and went to watch transformers..
which was such a disappointment sigh :(
it was soooooo draggy this time round :/
and i think that megan fox's hotter
though the girl's accent is ckkkcccuuutteee! ;D

boo,
i'm going to dock michael bay's pay!!!!!!

- abrupt ending -

haha but i had a good time spending this year's "birthday" w a very special someone :)

One Year Older!

2011-07-06T23:11:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! :D

a pictorial on how i spent my birthday! :)

tammy, lauren, wenlyn and sarah went to school to surprise me! :)
and when they passed me my present,
they were super duper excited!!!!
haha they wanted to see my reaction upon receiving this present! XD
i just kept laughing and laughing,
'cause it's soooooooo retarded and funny xDD
BUT it actually works!! HAHA! :D

it was lovely to see all of them ytd!! :)

the straw i'm drinking from is actually a sour sweet thingie w a hole in the middle! :D
so we all tried drinking my "peach red tea jia nata!" with it
and every time someone tried it, they give the omgsurprised!! expression! :D

then it was dinner w shengrui, amanda, ruth and mel @ Dempsey!! :)
these pictures don't exactly do the place much justice!
go to my FB for more pictures (larger!)
the restaurant was beautiful!!! :)
and the food was heavenly :')
albeit the small serving.
dessert was "orgasmic" (i quote ruth :P)
haha but yessssss omg the chocolate fudge cake + vanilla icecream
ORGASMIC!

very expensive place though! :(
but they treated the birthday girl!!! :)
teehee!
but i still feel bad laaaaaa so i tried to give them as much of my food
(which they gave me extra serving of!:) )

mini celebration at home! :)
my sister and i have the same birthday! :D
so we both got an icecream cake from swensons from our parents! :)
my mum was so high LOLLOL

i think at first i wasn't so excited for my birthday this year
'cause i'm really tired and sometimes unwell (urgh stomach:( ) these days
but my friends made me really excited about it eventually! :D
it was a good day! :)

which started epicly with me being late for school LOLLOL!
day started off badly, but ended off sweetly! :)
THANK YOU FWENS!!!! :)

POP LOH!

2011-07-04T00:18:00.002+08:00

erm, so as expected..i really couldn't wake up
HAHA so we decided to go a litttttlllllleeeeee bit later, like at 9-ish am...
and that was when erm the parade ended!
haha sorry SR!!! BUT we still went! :D

Lol, Leonard called me at 6.45am and when i picked up the phone he asked "EH, where are you all???"
and i was all groggy and sleepy "SLEEPINGGGGGG, later then goooooooo ZzzZZzz"
but we didn't manage to find him :/
sorry leonard :(

haha it was nice though seeing mel, ruth and even the smelly little boy! :)
for once, i wished i lost my sense of smell!!!!!
the "aroma" was just terrible, but we're nice, we breathed all the "fresh air" for SR!!!!! :P

CONGRATULATIONS ONCE AGAIN! :D
HAPPY POP TO ALL THE GUYS!!! :D

played ball in the night again :)
it was awesome as always, even though there were very few people!
and it's great how we still talk crap like it was 3 years back! :))

ThWACK!

2011-07-03T02:10:00.002+08:00

FINALLY!
evidence that i get bullied frequently by him!!
i know i'm smiling, but that's only cause i'm too used to smiling,
doesn't give an indication of how hurt i'm feeling in my heart...
:D

and he kept thwacking my head!!!!!!
like flicking his index finger onto my precious forehead! :(
freaking painful i tell you :(

SIIIGGGGGGHHHHHH
AND SPOILT MY BIRTHDAY SURPRISE BY TELLING ME
"i also not going to bake you a cake...yet"
and "since it's yr birthday, we go singapore flyer k? :D"
so i reject your ideas k? :D
haha jkjk la! :P

i think i laugh too much around him,
(and you know how when you laugh too much in a day, you get nightmares in the night??)
so much that i got TWO NIGHTMARES in ONE NIGHT! -.-
haha! but :)

POP LOH! :)
for our class guys!
while they are marching their 28 click (actually more hehe) i'm enjoying aircon!
going to watch their POP tmr too! :)
(HOPE I CAN WAKE UP OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG D:)

and today i accidentally "stole sth"... *guilty*
here's the story...
we went to buy pancakes from a bakery and it was in a small plastic bag.
he was holding onto the small plastic bag.
then we went to buy milk tea.
and there was a small plastic bag at the counter, which i thought was OUR PANCAKES.
so when our milk tea came, i took the small plastic bag (NOT our pancakes :( ) and then walked away.
bus stop was just outside the milk tea shop and coincidentally our bus came!
so we ran like mad and hopped onto the bus.
when i sat down, he put a hot plastic bag next to me...
i thought..."HUH, why so hot.. Ohhhh must be pancakes...OMGSHITWTH if the pancakes are next to me then what's in the small plastic bag i'm carrying??????!?!?!?! OMG OMG OMG..."
i panicked and raised the plastic bag in my hand up...
DIE (i mean DYE haha PUN PUN! :P)
eh yar...i accidentally koped someone's hair dye LOL
i was freaking out and laughing all at the same time HAHAHA
and i didn't know what to do...
it seems utterly stupid to give the box of hair dye to the police and i don't even know the owner even if we turn back...
so yeah, i hope whoever lost their hair dye wins some free hair treatment/ find some money on the floor!!!!!!!
PLS DON'T KARMA ME BACK, I REALLY DIDN'T MEAN IT!!!!! D:

ok better sleep NOW!

WOOOOOSSSSAAAA!

2011-06-30T18:22:00.002+08:00

YESSSSSAAAAA!
Cts ended 2 days ago,
i was busy slacking and sleeping ytd HAHA! :D
(which is kinduv' the reason why i can't sleep at night too, i have a screwed up body clock!)

so yessssaaaa i'm trying very hard to stay awake NOW
so that i'll be extra tired to sleep later and wake up bright and early tmr, refreshed for sch! :)

boyf was damn cute ytd trying to wake me up so that i'll be able to sleep in the night :D
he kept going "WAKE UP WAKE UPPPPP WAKEEEYYY WAKEEEYYY" non-stop over the phone
and i desperately tried to shut him up by pretending the phone was getting disconnected..
"what? WHAT DID YOU SAY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU ALREADY?!?!! hello hello HELLO? BAazxzxasaxzSASZXZaszxzx"
but he saw through my moment of genius! :(
"YAR YAR YAR, you think i stupid is it?!"
:D
- nods head :) -

he wasn't irritating enough though :)
so i spent almost the entire day sleeping and every time he called i was half asleep and was answering in a groggy voice
then he'll go "WHAT?!?!?!?! SLEEPING AGAINNNNNNNN?!?!?!?!"
haha i'm sucha pig :B

it's back to school today!
w restructured timetable which only screams
"LECTURES ALL DAY!!!! mwahahahaha"
unforgiving timetable
PCME,GP lectures all in one (crammed) day :(
my mind's realllllyyyyyy tired sigh
BUT I CAN'T SLEEP!!!!!!! -WIDENS SMALL EYES O.O-

going to play ball tomolooooooo~
woohoo! :)
today while walking into school i just kept looking at the outdoor court and was overcome with a wave of nostalgia and a rush of memories :)
beautiful ones ♥ :)

those pretty girls.

2011-06-27T23:20:00.003+08:00

goddamn upset and distracted.
i feel like breaking down.

but no i will try not to.
at least not tonight.

i just need chitra sharma so much now.
and i feel like typing so much
but i'll refrain from doing so.

i don't know how i'm going to make it through tonight and tomorrow.

~

(29/06)

I'm alrighty, don't worry! :)
Ade said this post sounds scary, but it's not that bad la! :D
i just needed to rant :P

i can only be pretty on wednesday :(

2011-06-26T14:07:00.002+08:00

and the title says it all.

i can't wait for WEDNESDAY! (end of the alll the papers!)
fyi, i am DAMN screwed for chem. sigh.

i can't wait for the WEEKENDS!
spend time w my boy (:
and no more "OH SHIT I'M GOING TO DIE FOR CHEM HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW?!?!?!"
spend time w fwens :3
haha hopefully we'll all be able to wake up and make it for shengrui's POP! :D

i can't wait for NEXT WEDNESDAY!
MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!! :D:D:D
it's like i can excuse myself x832948329480234920 from doing hw 'cause it's my birthday! :D
plus i get to see ruth and mel on that day (hopefully! :))

but for now, i'm going to look ugly for the next 2 days :(
SIGHHHHHHHHHHH

AH- Or A?

2011-06-24T11:16:00.002+08:00

I find this mildly entertaining in the morning, BUT IT DOES MAKE SENSE!!!!

Me: Do you pronounce the guy's name as AH-ZAR or A-ZAR?

Alan: What's the diff?

Me: There's a difference!

Alan: Azar

Me: One's AHHHHH and one's AAAAAAA

Me: One's like A B C D the A

Alan: f la, no, ahhhh. in melayu there's only ahhhhh, there's no ei.

Me: Oh right, haha okay!

and then he said he was going to forward it to everyone, which i immediately exclaimed NO
'cause it does seem quite retarded of me on hindsight.
and i'm not retarded, i'm cool~ HAHA

but i'll put it on my blog, where only friends who know i'm retarded reads it :P
AND IT DOES MAKE SENSE RIGHT?
plus i don't want to go calling someone early in the morning,
pronouncing his name all wrong!

Memories last forever

2011-06-23T20:46:00.002+08:00

Ruth Yang messaged you:
meh meh

when are you free to celebrate your birthday!

HAHAHAHA this is so funny, i totally WHAT THE HELL-ed her xD

coincidentally, last night when i couldn't sleep (well these days, i really can't sleep, insomnia much? :( )
my mind ran through all the lovely letters that i got before,
and then sometimes i creepily smiled to myself in the dark
HAHAHAHA!
but it was really nice, when someone writes to you and pieces your fragmented memories together (:
'cause you know, i forget parts of this and parts of that
which someone else rmbrs! (:

and so all my pretty letters are in one (pretty!:P) ikea box! :D

on another note:
well, it's okay..for now
and i hope it's all worth it.

I am ugly and short, unlike the rest

2011-06-23T02:12:00.007+08:00

Disclaimer: The above title is not meant to evoke agreement/pity.
It was what they named my fb album while they phone-napped my phone!!!
HAHA (:

Seoul Garden w lovely lauren, tammy, wenlyn & sarah! (:
it was great! laughing like mad at a chicken in jungle and SMALL world! :D
and then sarah started getting arty farty w tam's and my iphone!
(see iphone rocks! :D)

of course the creator didn't make any funny captions for herself,
such a pity...SO SHE DESERVES THIS! (;

HAHA we ate for FOUR HOURS :D
fully making use of our $17++ (:
and i kept cooking lotsa random NICE FOOD and feeding them! (:

headed to F21 so that sarah can spend her $50$10$10$10$10$10$10 vouchers! :D
stroke of genius! HEHE!

i want to grow taller and my feet grow larger ):
nothing ever seems to feet (LOL fit!)
first New Look, now F21!
GRAWRAWRAWRAWRAWRAWRAWR

think i'm falling sick too, sigh.
throat's really itchy and i'm coughing!!!! :(
I HATE FALLING SICK
PLSPLSPLSPLS NO FEVER :(

the birdies never sleep tonight~

2011-06-22T02:13:00.003+08:00

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEFEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-
ohm mama waayyyy

Ah-Whemawhapa Ah-Whemawhapa Ah-Whemawhapa Ah-Whemawhapa Ah-Whemawhapa

In the jungle, the mighty jungle,
the birdies never sleep tonight~

freaking hell, yesterday i've been trying to sleep since 11:30 but i only slept at 3! :(
all cause the annoying birdies don't sleep, like they are constantly caw-ing and tweeting all the way till 3am!!!! :(
are they clubbing? hougang's not a place to club, it's a slump!
ohm mama waayyyy~

i even tried to sleep by downloading some "sleep" app on my iphone to play the sound of ocean waves, fan, aircon...
ARGHZXZXZXZX didn't work at all :(
ohm mama waayyyy~

and CTs in 5 more days,
FFFFFFFFFFreak chemistry! :(
ohm mama waayyyy~

BOREDGALGAL92@HOTMAIL.COM

2011-06-20T02:14:00.002+08:00

NAME: Marilyn

AGE: 19

BIRTHDATE: 6 Jul

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 Truths about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.
blahblahblah

WHAT WAS YOUR:

1. last beverage = Chrysanthemum tea (omg look i know how to spell chrysantamum)

2. last phone call = Goodnight call from Wuhong :)

3. last text message = Sandy, HAPPYBIRTHDAY GIRL! :)

4. last song you listened to = Good Girls Go Bad by Cobra Starship (i am quite sick of my songs already :( )

5. last time you cried = Idk! Life's been pretty good! (: Probably the raffles match, which was damn long ago!

HAVE YOU EVER:

6. dated someone twice = Y

7. been cheated on = N

8. kissed someone & regretted it = N

9. lost someone special = Y

10. been depressed = Y

11. been drunk and threw up = N

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:

12. Maroon (Deep sexy red HAHA)

13. Special Colours, like teal, turquoise and mustard. Like upgraded versions of green, blue and yellow HAHA :P they are (sometimes) pretty unique and pretty! (:

14. DIRTY COLOURS eg. dirty green-my bag LOL ('cause that's what my friends all think i like - AHA! but they may be wrong...i hope HA!)

LAST YEAR (2010), HAVE YOU:

15. Made a new friend = Y

16. Fallen out of love = N (it was a continuation LOL)

17. Laughed until you cried = Y

18. Met someone who changed you = Y

19. Found out who your true friends were = Y

20. Found out someone was talking about you = N

21. Kissed anyone on your FB friend's list = HAHA Y

GENERAL:

22. How many people on your FB friends list do you know in real life = Like 99.999999%

24. Do you have any pets = Y

25. Do you want to change your name = N

26. What did you do for your last birthday = Had fun (:

27. What time did you wake up today = 12 ++ pm :P

28. What were you doing at midnight last night?= On the compt!

29. Name something you CANNOT wait for= Over and done w As AND THEN HOLIDAY~

30. Last time you saw your mother = 2 hours ago?

31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life = I wish everyone grows shorter :(

32. What are you listening to right now = My Aircon By My Room

33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom? = N

34. What's getting on your nerves right now = Exams and not being able to sleep

35. Most visited webpage = Facebook LOL

37. Nickname = Shortie. Meh. Meh-lin. Mar. Mary. Uglyshit (CHITRA). Trolley Lee (LOL! xD).

38. Relationship Status = Happily in love (:

39. Zodiac sign = Cancer

40. He or She = Vhat?!?!

41. Elementary = Rivervale Primary School

42. High School = St. Nicholas Girls', National Junior College

43. College = N

44. Hair color = Sad Black :(

45. Long or short = LONG HAIR! :D

46. Height = 152 yes i DO grow, even by 0.5cm!

47. Do you have a crush on someone?= N, what for? (:

49. Piercings = Y

50. Tattoos = Depends

51. Righty or lefty= R

FIRSTS :

52. First surgery= Stitches for my braces...loooonnngggg story

53. First piercing = K1?

54. First best friend = errrrr forgot :(

55. First sport you joined = Swimming

56. First vacation = Batam/Bintan?

58. First pair of trainers = errrrr IDK!

RIGHT NOW:

59. Eating = Air

60. Drinking = Air

61. I'm about to = Try to do math

62. Listening to = NOTHING bloody hell

63. Waiting for = myself to feel motivated, sigh.

YOUR FUTURE :

64. Want kids? = Y (:

65. Get Married? = Definitely! (:

66. Career? = MUST!

WHICH IS BETTER :

67. Lips or eyes = Eyes! (:

68. Hugs or kisses = Hugs! Like sqqqquuuueeezzzzeeee warm warm hugs! ^^

69. Shorter or taller = TALLER! DUH!

70. Older or Younger = Older (:

71. Romantic or Spontaneous = Spontaneously Romantic heh!

72. Nice stomach or nice arms = Arms!

73. Sensitive or loud = Sensitive (:

74. Hook-up or relationship = Relationship!

75. Trouble maker or hesitant = Trouble-maker to a small extent ;)

HAVE YOU EVER :

76. Kissed a stranger = N

77. Drank hard liquor = N

78. Lost glasses/contacts = N

79. Sex on first date = N

80. Broke someone's heart = don't think so

81. Had your own heart broken = Y

82. Been arrested = OH DEFINITELY

83. Turned someone down = Y

84. Cried when someone died= Y

85. Fallen for a friend = Y

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

86. Yourself = Depends :/

87. Miracles = Not really

88. Love at first sight = N

89. Heaven = N

90. Santa Claus = LOL N

91. Kiss on the first date = N

92. Angels = Y (:

NEW Indoor Sports Hall

2011-06-20T01:26:00.004+08:00

Friday

Mrng: PLAY BALL @ ISH
which stands for Indoor Sports Hall! (:
It's really quite awesome, being indoor, quite airy and da' love non-slip floor!
lauren, tammy and i! it was good to be back! (:
just that omg i'm damncui, run until wanna die HAHA
but still a good feeling! makes me happy! (:

silly me though! nvr train for too long! :P
i forgot to bring the ESSENTIALS for trg!
my water bottle and towel!!!!!!!! :(

it's great to train again (:

Evening: YUKI YAKI
the food there was ithinktheycheatourmoney
HAHA but company was good (:
caught up w jiamin, jiajian and shiya!
and HAPPY BIRTHDAY to MINMIN!!!! :D

we accidentally burnt a pot..whoops :P

and then all the rest of the time left for MEANIE!!! >:(
HAHA he bit my finger and left marks and it was really painful :(
so i took a pic and wanted to post it on his wall to show the world how he *sobs* ill-treats me
THEN HE BRUTALLY SNATCHED MY PHONE AWAY FROM ME
while i was trying to fill my growling stomach
and deleted the photo :(

i miss him already :(

∞ Infinity: Now & Forever

2011-06-15T01:52:00.006+08:00

waiting for stuffs to get printed,
felt like blogging! (:

got this off tumblr:

"Love, as opposed to infatuation, is a calmer, more mature feeling. It is a sense of stability. Love is still exciting, at times. It can change day-to-day. Love takes work. The feelings are not supported by the highs of hormones, but by a shared love and respect for each other. Love is what exists after infatuation fades, if you are lucky.

Love allow people to be who they really are. While arguments aren’t encouraged, they happen. Sometimes they happen a lot, especially in times of stress. Love is admitting that your partner has faults, and so do you, but that is okay. You have realistic expectations of each other. Love is accepting."

(:
it's just, i feel really happy these days
and it's unbelievable, cause i haven't felt so happy in so long and i don't want this to ever end!

it's just, sometimes i'm really scared what happens whan all this infatuation ends (either ways)?
but as time passes, i think it has somewhat changed for me..into a more mature feeling (:
it's there, just not as excited and wild as before (sometimes though)
but something else, a sense of pleasantness and stability (:
it's really nice (:

it's just, sometimes i'm afraid to let my feelings be known
lest i jinx it and we both stop feeling this way
haha but i'm really v happy (:
happy to know that no matter what happens
i can always seek comfort in you (:
happy to know that we will always try to sort any unhappiness between us in the fastest and sweetest possible manner (:

it's just, sometimes i feel i've finally found someone who understands how i want my relationship to work out,
maturely, little cold wars, talking things out as simple as they may be (:
i am not unreasonable hor! :P

i guess my first relationship changed my attitude towards relationships so i can handle it more thoughtfully and i'm really glad that i can treat you even better! (:

it's just, i haven't ever felt this way,
this special way (:

okay gtg sleep soon! (:
so that i can wake up early (5.45 AM :O) to give my darling boy a wake up call for his new vocation! (:

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY! (:

No One Like You

2011-06-14T14:08:00.001+08:00

ytd was a very interesting day..scary too!
HAHA! (:

thank god for you (:
hehe! (:

Structurally Unemployed

2011-06-14T01:15:00.002+08:00

(oh nooo i have lost count of the days and dates!!!)
erm..right SATURDAY! (:
my class participated in an "overnight" cip!
"overnight" cause we had to "check in" at NTU, sleepover and wake up at 3.30 AM the next mrng to get ready for our event...NVM
HAHAHA
National Vertical Marathon, NOT nvm :P
it was (hopefully) a (literally) ONCE in a lifetime experience!
DAMN SHAG I TELL YOU! :(

it is definitely an event worth blogging about
('cause i have sooo much to rant -haha!..but made a few good memories too! :))

SATURDAY
reached NTU at 9.30pm and was kept in their sports hall to sleep!
my class is awesome, cause we were able to keep everyone together in the same bus the next day! (:
AND find a little corner for all of us to be together! (:
some cosy wosy ping pong site! (:
we played a couple of fun games and i ended up not sleeping
'cause really...i don't think i'll feel less grumpy if i have to wake up at (freaking!) 3.30!! D:
haha i think i was quite awake at 3.30! (:

SUNDAY
we reached OneRafflesPlace at ard 4-ish AM
and got split into different groups with different jobs!
Emilia and I were "RUNNERS"..who didn't have to run, just walk lol!
our job was to change the papers at the registration booth (i don't really know how to explain it..)
but really, it does not require any form of running except maybe the urge to run away from the event! haha! :D

you know how sometimes stoning just drains even more energy than when you're doing sth?
that was exactly what we experienced :/
more on that later!
so we bummed around (feeling VERY shag) w nothing to do until 6.30am? when people started streaming in...
but em and i were only "busy" (for a minute maybe? HAHA!) at 7am when we had to change the papers! in the meantime, we couldn't stand it and went around to have fun and play games! :D

OKAY I ADMIT!
the games were really really quite fun! (:
we played KINECT (omg have you played kinect? even cooler than wii! :D) and looked damn retarded jumping about and flapping our fists in the air!
but it was great! i felt less shag...cause like i said stoning just drains more energy away!

we were soooooooo bored (sometimes) we walked like i think 1034839028092 rounds around the place trying to look important.
i'm sure that there's over-manpower there :/
we were soooo structurally unemployed and desperate to do something,
ANYTHING but stone! make ourselves useful..ANYTHING!

AND THEN I FOUND THE BEST JOB EVER! :D
clerk at registration desk! WOOHOO! :D
made a couple of fast friends there too! (:
(it's so easy to make friends when everyone around is feeling the same way...BORED! :P)
and i must say, the incharge there is AWESOME MAX! :):):)
he's super duper nice! he bought us JOLLYBEAN AND KOI! :D omigosh! :)
BEST JOB EVER also let me charge my dying 12% phone to 98%! ^^

AND THEN I FOUND THE WORSE JOB EVER! D:
after completing our job at the registration booth!
i screwed up once at the desks, but no worries Francis (the incharge) was so cheerful and encouraging even though i could tell he was actually very tired and troubled by the mess i created. :(
i tried my very best to make up for it by getting everyone drinks and focusing very hard on my 2nd shift! (:
AND THEN THE WORSE JOB EVER! D:
omg the incharge was so whiny and complain-y and frustrated and didn't wanna let us go
we were one of the last to leave and i was seriously about to cry (from the tiredness) when i saw other volunteers leaving one by one! :(
i was soooo tired i fell asleep giving out certificates! :( shag max shag max

the class was getting very grumpy too!
it was a very bad period of time! :(
AND I'M SO FREAKING GLAD IT'S ALL OVER!!!! :)

next time i'm going there as a participant
(who looked even more energized than us, volunteers, after they had climbed 63 storeys!!!! :S )
this is the first time i started wondering if CIP is just a cheap excuse for free menial labour :(
some people say that volunteerism is not a spirit well-embraced by singapore students.
why not think the flipside? how volunteerism is being manipulated.
CIP or no CIP hours, i wouldn't want to go through this(specifically) again :/
it's just really crazymadtired (i know the event organisers will be feeling worse)
but i just feel that it could have been much better organised.

maybe if they implement a better system and i'm in NTU next year
i don't mind volunteering 'cause it CAN be fun too :)
just..better organisation :/
emilia got a fever from the exhaustion and it was v upsetting to see a friend go down cause of such management skills :/

OK END OF POST
I SLEPT DAMN LONG!

When you wish upon a star

2011-06-11T00:19:00.002+08:00

really happy today,
well at least for the later part of today! (:
cause mrng and afternn was spent studying
and being sian coupled w that perpetual headache! D:

someone was so darn happy after posting results
which made my mood soar as well! (:
and then i got carried and twirled round and round, laughing non-stop
like some fairytale thing
so it was rweally rweally rweally naise :3
had a sweet dinner at Jack's Place (secretly craving for it! :P)
and then it was back home! (:

HAPPY HAPPY~! ^.^

The Problem with Platonic Relationships

2011-06-10T02:16:00.002+08:00

it's 2:20am
and i should be sleeping since i signed out of msn 2 and 1/3 hours ago!
haha! but i just can't sleep *ULTRA SAD FACE*
and my head keeps throbbing, idk why
i think voldemort is doing sth evil and i'm feeling it! :D

my thoughts just wandered about and landed on this topic
and i felt like talking to someone but there's no one to talk to in this dead hour!
so i thought, wheewhoopeedeedoo why not talk to myself on my blog? :D

i have came to a conclusion that platonic relationships do not work out (largely so)
oh oh listen to my reasoning! i think it's good! :D
so to start off, i shall start by defining my boundaries!

Platonic Relationship:
A chaste relationship between a man and a woman, marked by only a very close friendship.
And by "close", i would like to define it as "best friends" kinda close!

Platonic relationships often end up with liking each other at the wrong time/ at the right time (which makes you both a couple eventually - but i'll come to that later! (: )
well, mostly from a girl's POV,
i've loved every single best (girl)friend i had/have
in the non-sexual way of course!
and have always thought it fun to be spending my whole life w them! :)

translating these same feelings to a "guy best friend"
it would be difficult not the fall in love w this special guy,
because
1. you have already established that by being your exclusive "best friend" (sharing troubles, happiness and all), you have set aside this special alcove in your heart which says
"People i want to spend the rest of my life with!"
2. Being of opposite genders, we are genetically "hardwired" to want some affection from someone so close to you.
girl-girl hugs are fine, girl-guy hugs may change your relationship into something very different.

as simple as these reasons are,
i find them highly realistic
unless...
1. the guy is gay
2. both the guy and girl are in relationships of their own (each have their own partners)
but 2. is a little risky, what if they start confiding in each other when they quarrel with their own partners and find out they have more in common than they had expected?
gay guys are great friends to be with on the other hand! :D
they make great shopping partners and awesome relationship advisors! :)

i feel that it is alright for a girl to have guy friends,
but a guy bestfriend most often changes their relationship to morethanjustbestfriends over time.
so it's perfectly cool to have guy friends,
just that we should watch out for that line between "just friends" and "best friends"
unless you know that you're open to having a relationship w this special guy friend! :)

which leads me to also conclude
that a guy best friend will always be the best lover :)
(ONLY IF the feeling is mutual!)

okay i still don't feel sleepy...
now what? :(

2011-06-06T13:00:00.000+08:00

2011-06-05T23:59:00.003+08:00

HI TODAY I PLAYED BASKETBALL
W THE SNRS + SARAH
& WE HAD LOTSA LOTSA LOTSA FUN
THAT'S WHY I'M TYPING IN CAPS NOW
IT MEANS I'M SHOUTING FROM PURE JOY
WE HAD SO MANY ROUNDS OF BASKETBALL
AND WE BECAME SMELLY AND DIRTY
BUT WE DIDN'T CARE
CAUSE WE WERE HAVING SO MUCH WHOOPEEDO FUNX!

happy happy~ ^^

i need to go scuba-diving in 'emerald blue waters'

2011-06-04T23:19:00.003+08:00

Nurse reveals the top 5 regrets people make on their deathbed

By Bronnie Ware (who worked for years nursing the dying)

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn't work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly,in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved.Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip.But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks,love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have sillyness in their life again.
When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again,long before you are dying.

to be contd!
cause caring bf is asking me to study!!!! :P

2011-06-03T01:07:00.002+08:00

(this is not apple crumble, but it reminds me of apple crumble!)
APPLE CRUMBLLLLLEEEEEEEEE!!!!! :3

Ingredients

1 (9 inch) deep dish pie crust
5 cups apples - peeled, cored and thinly sliced
1/2 cup white sugar
3/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/3 cup white sugar
3/4 cup all-purpose flour
6 tablespoons butter

Directions

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C.) Arrange apple slices in unbaked pie shell. Mix 1/2 cup sugar and cinnamon; sprinkle over apples.
Mix 1/3 cup sugar with flour; cut in butter until crumbly. Spoon mixture over apples.
Bake in preheated oven for 35 to 40 minutes, or until apples are soft and top is lightly browned.

Baking Fruit Pies

Baking fruit pies is a rather straightforward technique, but a few tips can help to make your pies come out looking and tasting perfect.

1. Preheat the oven to the temperature that your recipe recommends. Most fruit pies bake at a temperature between 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) and 450 degrees F (230 degrees C). Some recipes call for baking the pie in a 450 degree F oven to begin with, then turning down the oven to about 350 degrees F. This helps set the shape of the crust in recipes with a lot of fat; it can keep your crust from slouching.

2. To add a richer color to a double-crust or lattice-topped pie, brush the top crust with milk or lightly beaten egg before baking.

3. Always bake pies on a baking sheet to prevent spillovers in the oven.

Baking a pie with a raw fruit filling will take about an hour.

Berry, apple, and pear pies cook for approximately 45 minutes. When using a pre-cooked filling, pies can bake at a higher temperature for a shorter period of time, just enough to thoroughly bake the crust and heat the filling.

To check the doneness of the filling, insert a knife into the center of the pie. If it meets with little or no resistance, the pie is done. If the pie is not quite done but the top or edges are becoming too dark, loosely cover the top of the pie with aluminum foil to shield it from the heat. A glass pie dish is a great way to ensure the bottom crust is fully baked; using a baking stone or pizza stone is another trick. Baking on a stone ensures that the bottom crust on even the juiciest fruit pie will be done when the top is brown.

4. For shine and sparkle, glaze the crust. Thin a quarter cup of light corn syrup with very hot water. When the pie is done, brush the thinned syrup over the top of the crust. You can add granulated sugar or decorative sugar at this time. Return the pie to the oven for two to three minutes to let the glaze dry and set. Once the pie is done baking, carefully remove it from the oven. Let the pie cool to room temperature before slicing to allow the filling to set.

From: ALLRECIPES.COM

I WANNA BAKE AND EAT APPLE CRUMBLE!!!!!!!!!!
nom nom nom! :)

Battle Hymn Of The Tiger Mother - By Amy Chua

2011-06-01T14:34:00.005+08:00

The Tiger Mother & her two daughters

- Sophia (on the piano) and Louisa (on the violin)

I discovered this highly controversial yet entertaining book from Readers' Digest.
I was initially taken aback by her beautiful daughters and enraptured by a short excerpt from the book in the magazine.
It didn't disappoint me! :)
A splendid read! :)

One of the most memorable incidents brought up in the book
was when Amy Chua called her daughter "garbage"
and another occasion when she refused to accept cards made by her daughters
during her birthday, as they were too slipshod and possibly made in just a matter of seconds.

The atrocities of how immigrants parents (as generalized in the book) raised their children startled me.
I have always pride myself w the glorious childhood my parents had raised me up with.
I daresay that the nights out camping, catching miniature crabs in Pasir Ris Park, collecting saga seeds at the park near my house, hiking in Bukit Timah & Sugei Buloh, playing board games and going on rides at the pasir malam were on of the best times i had during my childhood
(which was almost the whole of it! aha!)
i had a wonderful childhood and a part of me misses it terribly.

but just maybe
if my parents/parent had drilled me the hardcore "Chinese" way,
things may have been different.
i may have completed my piano exams, all the way to grade 8 AND higher
(now i play it leisurely)
i may have gotten somewhere, drawing, painting and sketching
(now i do it leisurely)
i may have made it playing badminton
(well, now i play it leisurely too)
i may have been an angry child,
but an excellent, talented adult.
instead of the "jack of all trades, but master of none"

one thing my parent (dad actually) did really drill me HARDCORE from young
was "Academics"
in fact, i think he might have been more ill-tempered and scarier than Amy Chua
LOL @ the time he PUNCHED the clock cause i couldn't tell the time
idk if it's entirely good or bad
'cause thanks to him, i did get reasonable good grades then
but i have also started questioning myself (ever since he started releasing the reins)
why was i studying so hard.
fyi, when i was young, my dad loved it when i told him my ambition was to become a doctor/lawyer.
those who know me, knows that i don't.

sometimes when ppl (my age) tell me that they aspire to become a doctor/lawyer
and i ask them why
their reply would be "it makes my parents happy"
hmmm, to me, it's more impt for yourself to be happy w what you're doing.
it's going to be the factor sustaining you through your entire worklife
AND what happens when your parents are gone?

maybe sometimes children don't know what they want from young
they need to be drilled
and (from the book, which i particularly agree with)
it's only when you start to excel in something
before you start to enjoy it.
and to excel,
unless you're really gifted,
you just have to work hard for it.
work very very hard.

i'm not blaming my parents for anything.
i'm just inspired to become a good parent (in the future!)
to strike an essential balance between work and play.
i sympathize w the dreary childhood that Sophia and Lulu had, the quarrels that could have been avoided,
yet marvel at their grand accomplishments today
(having played at Carnegie Hall, motivated and moved Julliard teachers. W-O-W)
and the tenacity and strength of their character.

i want to be able to raise someone so awe-inspiring
and at the same time,
make childhood one of his/her best periods of their life!

HAHAHAHAHAHA
i need to let my parents read this book
AND read it when i become one myself! :)

2011-06-01T00:50:00.002+08:00

Pirates Of the Carribean today! :)
w Mel!
& dinner later w Maxine and Ruth! :)

I still can't get over how beautiful and perfect the mermaids look in the movie!!! :O
i think i would get seduced by them too! xD

and then idk
selfishly,
i just felt pretty sad that everyone's leaving (for real) this time round.

it's just lonely.
alone.
by myself.
one person.
no one else.

just cold.

2011-05-24T11:16:00.000+08:00

RETAIL THERAPY FTW!!!!! :D

2011-05-24T10:35:00.002+08:00

a disappointing study day ytd,
i just can't ~~do work~~ study while being cooped up at home.
( i enjoy doing homework, but not studying! it's different!!!
studying = read read read borrrriiinnnggg yawnzxzxz)
NEED. EXCITEMENT.
lol!

but but butttttt! :)
i got a surprise call this mrng
which totally made my mrng
and motivated me to make today a much more fulfilling day! :)

so here's to 8 hours of effective studying! :D

2011-05-19T00:59:00.002+08:00

i love having PE w my class,
'cause we always end up laughing like doofus-es
one class of doofus-es tumbling on the sunny green field
is mad awesome! :)

i love meeting up w new friends and old friends during aristal! :)

i miss 05,
i miss mel, ruth, CHITRA (omg!!!) and many many of them! :(

i miss having trainings
and feeling fit and healthy!
gosh i feel so fattttt
flabby arms :(

i love how amanda looks so so sooooo pretty! :)
damn jealous,
but damn pretty cannot ta han,
i think i might turn les for her xD

joyous :>

2011-05-17T00:30:00.002+08:00

*smiles sweetly*
*passes phone over to let him view my tumblr post*

"of course, i knew that!"
:)
haha stupid boy who views everything in "high definition"!
gah! (:

~

rawr, nothing much to do these days :/
the weather's such a downer
i hate the humid, hot climate
I WANT IT TO SNOW!
hah!

2011-05-15T08:48:00.003+08:00

this is a belated post.
we lost.
2 points to tie the game (47-49 i think),
3 points to promote to top 4.
so no more top 4.

i find it such a waste w so much potential in the team this year.
but what coach said at the end made sense.
we were the ones who lead to our own defeat.
masters of our own defeat.
but i think from here, we can all learn.
i'm glad we all had a takeaway from this nats (:
(every nats! haha!)
& i KNOW my jnrs WILL persevere and make their snrs proud next year! (:
results or no results, it's the hearts that they bring on court! (:

i'm regretful that i couldn't contribute more.

~

so now the 4 days long weekend,
which i had initially set aside for trg,
becomes v empty.
suddenly.
i feel so lost.

what should i do w all the time
; intended to sweat it out w the ppl
i have grown to love and admire.

2011-05-12T22:39:00.000+08:00

2011-05-12T21:30:00.000+08:00

jubilation:
winning AJ by 9 pts today!
which means we are one more step closer to the SACRED TOP FOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*jumps around excitedly*
with one more game (must win!) tmr -against NYJC
& one more day nearer to forcing mrsham to eat durian
(HE HATES IT! ;) )

it was another one of those tenseomgshitshitahhhhh moment
during the last 1 minute!
as oor jj puts it "HEART ATTACK AH I TELL YOU!"
haha :)

2011-05-10T23:59:00.004+08:00

Today i don't feel like doing anything,
I just wanna lay in my bed (Y)

hate 2nd day cramps :(
can't concentrate during lessons
& i kept rolling around clutching my abdomen,
cringing in excruciating pain.
did i make it sound painful enough?

haha but THANKS SNRS! for buying the pills for me! (:
they are like miss tey!
bimboly pink! HEHE! :D

hmmm today we lost to HC by a wide margin, 33-71.
it's really a pretty tough period (LITERALLY AND FIGURATIVELY! hahaha pun pun! xD) for us now.
with several of us injured/sick/not well :/
it demands a lot from us mentally and emotionally.
those on court and those off court.

i love this team
because of what we've been through during trgs
(ohmyword i can't count the number of sessions i got so fried under the sun this year),
because of how we had bonded through training camp
(this year's camp is seriously the toughest camp i've been through, i felt like going home on the first day already! haha!),
because of how we've come tgt outside of trg sessions
(laughing at laughable anthea! :D),
because of the potential this team has that pushes even the weakest player to hunger for improvement (:
because of the undying spirit on court, the bench and the stands (:

it was beautiful, to say the least,
the day we played the RJ match (:

we've 2 more games left for the 2nd round,
this thurs and fri
so lets' rise to the occasion and relive that sensation, that motivation, that hunger
and make history for Njbasketball (:

it's going to be difficult,
but trust me,
it will be worth it (:

2011-05-09T00:47:00.002+08:00

I'm no beauty queen,
I'm just
ℬeautiful ℳe ♥

lovin' Selena Gomez's new style & song
"Who Says"

(:

2011-05-07T16:13:00.003+08:00

Everyone thinks that i have it all
But it's so empty living behind these castle walls
These castle walls.
If I should tumble, If I should fall
Would anyone hear me screaming behind these castle walls?
There's no one here at all,

Behind these castle walls.

feeling like crap.
but this pic cheered me up a lil! (:

2nd round,
what a high price to pay.

2011-05-07T09:45:00.005+08:00

POLLING DAY!

mighty exciting i must say,
woke up to the sounds of tables and chairs clanging downstairs
yep part of my void deck is being used as a polling station!

going to be out the whole day (w him! (: )
so now's a good time to blog a little about how i feel about elections this year
before the results come out at night!

i listened to rallies and read up about the candidates online (no crowds ftw!)
though i'm not very in touch w Singapore's policies i can tell that the Tin can really urghomgcannotstanditrislowlol!
cannot take it, every time i try to listen to her rally, i must TRY.
i can't stand the way she talks (like some pri sch oral) and the way she carries herself.
it's sad to note that she'll most probably be elected into parliament cause she's under gct GRC
SAD WE ARE ALL GOING TO BECOME BIMBOS
omg i "don't know what to say" *stomps ground* LOL!

and the whole aljunied hype
i don't really know much about the PAP grp there
only know George Yeo.
but i know that the Workers' Party candidates are wayyyyyy strong!
haha idk what's going to happen
cause heard lotsa mixed thoughts about who's going to win
all i know is
maybe they shouldn't vote WP la, later become a "slum" like Hougang how?
then gotta live w it for 5 years and "repent"
LOL!
OH PLS HOUGANG IS NOT A SLUM!!
i am ready to defend my estate, 'cause i know KNOW KNOWWWW how pleasant the environment is!
on a more positive note, he has provided me w a new joke! :D
declare "I'M BACK TO THE SLUM!!!" everyday when i reach home
then parents just gimme this -.- look! :D

some oppositions are really good,
some are just all talk and no action.

i just hope for a nation of wise voters today.

2011-05-05T23:54:00.002+08:00

today was just an awful day.

thanks to FOOD (YUM :D), lovesssssss (: , basketball!, amanda, shengrui and hsiuyen!!!! (: for a splendid end to a lousy day! :D

please let tmr be a better day (:

and happy enlistment to all y'all out there! ;)
hehe! :D